TRIGGER WARNING ANOREXIA TRIGGER WARNING
I can't sleep because I am obsessing over how much I've eaten this weekend. While I was able to stay under my calorie limit earlier in the week because Luke was at work so I only had to eat with him for dinner... Saturday was bad, today was even worse, and I'm not sure that the exercise I've been doing is golng to make up for it. I'm very nearly praying for the strength to keep going. Don't just all out refuse to eat, please please please, Luke needs you! But this is BAD and I can feel myself getting bigger... And bigger... And bigger... I just need one day to get back on track.... I need to get back to where I was! I am so pathetic, I can't believe how easily I let myself slip into overeating when I probably could have gotten away with just pretending. I WANTED to let go. I wanted to lose control because I am weak and lazy. I am all talk and no action. I should have made better choices this weekend. Fuck me! The last thing I need is fat fat fat fat this is all I want all I need and pathetic as it is, all I have going for me. Come on, lazy bones, be a better actor, do it for him, but above all else protect your figure!!!!! STOP BEING SUCH A LOSER LARD ASS. |
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