The Facebook group really re-energized my interest in Bloop, and keeping this guy trucking along for good. I was surprised at how easy it was to recover all of my old accounts -- even the stupid troll one. I'm looking back at all of my old entries, most of which I hope are privatized and... wow, they hurt to read. It's like looking into the mind of my blunder years. Most people get nothing but pictures and maybe a physical diary, but I get all of the inner thoughts of an idiot teenager.
It is super interesting, but boy is it difficult to get through. I'm surprised at how much I separated my real life from my online life, despite how much time I spent trying to get the people in my life to make accounts here.
I don't know if I feel all that good reading through it all. I'm lucky enough to have had my life get better and better over time. I was unhappy as a teenager, and I couldn't wait to grow up. While most people tend to look back at their formative years fondly, I feel... indescript feelings? It's like a strong indifference. The term bittersweet comes to mind, but I don't know if the sweet part is all that sweet.
I guess the silver lining here is that things are great now, and my relationship with myself is as strong as it's ever been. I don't feel all that lonely, I'm a lot more confident in my social interactions, and a lot more comfortable in the world in general, and how I allow myself to be perceived by others.
I'm glad to hear everyone is doing so well. I guess except for Mindi, who had a seriously unfortunate incident with a neighbor and her dog, but I'll let her share that horrific story on her own.
I hope to update more. It's interesting getting to know all of you all over again. |
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