So I thought I'd try this online thing again. Did it a while ago.. worked out well then. Sooo here we go!
Here's my main concern/background of shit that's going on right now.
1. I'm sleeping with my best friend, who is the "best friend" of my ex boyfriend. (yeah, try to swallow that one.)
2. I've been single for 4 months (9 year relationship, mind you!)
3. The guy I'm "dating" I have no interest in.
So yeah, there you have it. So here's today's issue: I was supposed to have a date with this guy tonight that I've been out with 3 times already. Let's call him j2. He's nice, handsome, tall, has a good job.. pretty good packaged deal overall. We kissed once; not a bad kisser either. Thing is he's 9 years older than I am and is recently divorced with 3 kids. Well I shouldn't say "thing is", cause that's not the part that's "wrong" with him. It's just the fact that I have no real "spark" or whatever. Which leads me to my next point:
j1 (my best friend with benefits) is taking up too much of my mental space. I feel like I'm somewhat obsessed with him and that's ruining my need to find other guys. I mean, maybe I'm not into j2 because of j1. Know what I mean? I mean trust me I have no desire to actually date j1. And if you knew j1 you'd know why. (He likes to well, "spread his seed". He's kind of a slut. But he doesn't have STD's.. cause he just got it checked haha). Anyway, he's phenomenally gifted in everything concerning sex, so I don't exactly want to give that up just yet.
I've also recently come to the conclusion that I want to stay single for as long as possible. Fuck being in a long term relationship. There's too much fun out there. Not that I want to sleep with every guy I meet, but I like to know that the possibility to do so is out there.
ANYWAY I'll end this one for today, or else we're gonna have a novel on our hands. TTYL |
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