So I actually decided to sleep over j1's house yesterday. We didn't have sex (STILL on my effing period), but we cuddled/kissed a lot. It was kinda sweet actually. It's kinda funny actually, I was resting my head on his chest and his shoulder started twitching, so he asked if I could feel it (and if it bothered me), and I was like "no, but I can feel your heartbeat", and he goes "wait, I have one of those?". The reason I'm mentioning this is cause this totally describes him (and I thought it was funny). He's not really about being emotional with a girl; romantic love is definitely NOT in the picture for him. (To give a little bit of background, he was in love with this girl when he was 20ish, and she totally screwed him over, so he's been jaded ever since.) Not that this is a problem for me, cause as you all know by now, I'm def not looking for love. OH which reminds me of a dream I had yesterday:
I dreamed that I was sleeping over j1's (which I was in real life), but 2 of my friends Eber and Jaime were there, as well as my ex :/ So at one point j1 leaves his room and my ex is in bed with me. I was disgusted and totally wanted to be with j1, so I leave the room to find him, and go lay down on the couches with him to cuddle. Anyway I woke up after that and when I went back to sleep I was doing naughty things with j1 but it kept going back between him and my ex.. weird. Like one minute it was j1 (yay), next it was my ex (boo). I think I have issues.
Anyway I kept waking up, and I finally snuck out of his house (in real life) around 8 30 this morning. I was gonna kiss him goodbye, but I decided against it.. I'm not really sure why. I think I didn't want him to wake up.
Speaking of kissing, he kisses way different than what I'm used to. He actually uses very little tongue, which is actually kind of sensual in a way. I mean I don't have THAT much experience kissing guys, I've only kissed 5 guys in my life. Oh, and I'll make a separate entry for the "first kiss" (of j1 of course, I'm totes obsessed).
Ugh, I'm on gchat and my ex just messaged me about Otakon. I don't know if I should stop talking to him or not cause we decided to stay friends. 30 minutes later: I'm breaking up with him (as a friend). I'll keep ya posted. TTYL |
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