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Beyond Belief
by A RedSox Fan

previous entry: "From Entrapment  To Infinity" *poem !WARNING!

next entry: Last night, I felt old

Am I "blind" or just too nice? Thoughts appreciated

08/19/2009

MY BOSS sends out an email to other’s in the company.
I told Jonathan (the blind relief- gosh that sounds mean, sry- guy that was at the counseling center) that I would forward his email out... below is what he was looking for in a supervisor to help him get certain credits. He asked if an LMHC could do supervisions w him... below is what he wanted. Again im just sending as he asked me too - don't know much about much =]


MY BOSS sends me an email 2 minutes later
Jonathan, I wanted to foward you the email that i sent out about the
requirements you want. As i wanted you to know that i did that..... scott and everyone really didnt know who you were. I referred to you as blind as they knew you at hawthorn. i am soooooooo sorry as that sounds so offensive. i even noted that in my email to them, how it sounds means. i wanted to write you and just you again to tell you that i am sorry. they didn’t remember who you were and i feel terrible that thats how i referred to you. so again i am so sorry. please dont take what i wrote (you being blind) as anything offensive. God, i cant believe myself. i am so sorry. but as you can tell i wasnt hiding anything as i forwarded to you. again, i was typing fast to send out as i wanted you to have the supervisions you asked for. again i am so sorry and will tell you that when i see you. so sorry!

MY reply email to my boss
HI, I want to tell you a short story of my first day of my Professional Seminar class in grad school. The professor, who I previously never met, had me sit next to him and says to the class "This is Jonathan. He is a student here as some of you may know and he is here for the same reason you are here, to get a degree. Now, he is blind. There is no reason to sugar coat it. We can see he is blind and he knows he is blind too. There is nothing to hide. I am not going to treat him any different than anyone else and I would hope as mature adults, you wont treat him any different either."

The moral of this story... I know I am blind. You know I am blind. I have no problem people saying I am blind as long as it is not in a negative or belittling my knowledge, way. Which you have never done.
If people know me for being "that blind guy", great. At least they know me. And if they know me, they can co-currently think of "that blind guy" and "that great guy who is smart, understanding and a great listener" (Well, qualities I think I possess)

Thank you for sending out the email.
Stay cool
Jonathan

Boss’s reply
Gosh, you have no idea how happy your email just made me. i didnt like that i said that. i know it is obvious and i know everyone knows - i just didnt like how it sounded so i wanted you to know my intention was good as i know you know that now. thanks for responding and thanks for sharing that story. see you tomorrow.

*********************************************

When I read the first email, I thought nothing of it. I got the second email and laughed as I was reading it. To me, it wasn’t a big deal and I felt as she was blowing it out of proportion.

I showed the emails to two of my friends. One who is blind and another who has a short arm. They both said that if they were in my position, they would have been furious, offended and would take the matter to a higher authority or one of my friend said they would sue the company.... For saying I am blind? Should Charly Brown be sued for calling the girl he has a crush on "the redhead girl"?

Did I miss something?
Am I just “too” nice of a guy?
Am I the one who is wrong?

How would you handle this situation if you were in my shoes?

Please, Please, Please, thoughts are appreciated.

previous entry: "From Entrapment  To Infinity" *poem !WARNING!

next entry: Last night, I felt old

0 likes, 10 comments

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I think you handled it well. However, I don't think your boss was wrong in feeling remorse in her wording. In a professional setting, proofreading should ALWAYS be done. The fact that she could insert something like "gosh that sounds mean" instead of just replacing "the blind guy" with "the guy at the counseling center" is baffling to me. As someone that isn't a regular reader and doesn't know what sort of job you have, I can't really say whether it was appropriate or not... but... it seems like it would have saved herself a headache to just re-read the email and fix it before hitting 'send!' Also, overall, like I said I don't know what sort of job you have or how formal it is but people that don't use punctuation in a work setting really irk me, heh. But she did seem sincerely apologetic and I don't think taking it to her supervisor or higher authority is necessary.

[mixieStar|0 likes] [|reply]

I'm actually a tiny bit confused. A little more background, maybe the boss's original "rude" email might help me a little more.
But in general, you're a very nice guy who is always willing to help others. That of course, isn't "too" nice but just the right amount of nice.

[Kate.Monster|0 likes] [|reply]

If you weren't offended by it then, I wouldn't worry. You know your boss better than anyone of us, so I'm sure you know if they were being offensive ... Just from reading this though ...to me it doesn't sound like they were.

[Hope Rising Star|0 likes] [|reply]

I think you handled it really well. I didn't see any problem with it at all.

[»Scarlett's Mommy«|0 likes] [|reply]


I WOULDN'T BE FURIOUS. I MEAN, BEING BLIND IS UNUSUAL - OF COURSE PEOPLE WILL KNOW YOU AS THE 'BLIND GUY', AS WELL AS BY YOUR PERSONALITY WHEN THEY GET TO KNOW YOU BETTER. BUT WHAT I FIND ODD IS THE FACT THIS PERSON WROTE 'the blind relief- gosh that sounds mean, sry- guy that was at the counseling centerr'. I MEAN, IF SHE WAS TALKING THAT WOULD MAKE SENSE, BUT IT WAS AN EMAIL. WITH TYPING, UNLIKE WITH TALKING, THERE IS A DELETE OPTION! IF SHE'D REALLY THOUGHT IT SOUNDED MEAN, SHE COULD HAVE SIMPLY DELETED THE 'THE BLIND RELIEF' PART, AND WRITTEN 'THE GUY WHO WAS WAS AT THE COUNSELLING CENTRE'. IT'S LIKE SHE WANTED TO WRITE THAT YOU WERE THE BLIND GUY, BUT ALSO EXPRESS AWARENESS OF THE FACT THAT IT IS POLITICALLY INCORRECT TO DO SO. BUT THE THING IS TOO, SHE HAS TO MENTION YOUR BLINDNESS FOR A FUTURE SUPERVISOR - LIKE THEY'D NEED TO BE AWARE TO MAKE ACCOMMODATIONS. SO THE WHOLE 'SRY THAT SOUNDS MEAN' IS A BIT OF A CHILDISH WAY TO DEAL WITH IT. I'D SAY HER WRITTEN COMMUNICATION SKILLS AREN'T VERY GOOD (USING 'GOSH' IN PROFESSIONAL COMMUNICATION IS A BIT ODD TOO!). A BETTER EMAIL WOULD HAVE INITIALLY REFERRED TO YOU AS THE GUY (WELL, 'MAN', NOT 'GUY', TO BE PROFESSIONAL ABOUT IT!) AT THE COUNSELLING CENTRE, AND THEN GONE ON TO MENTION YOUR BLINDNESS AS SOMETHING THEY NEED TO BE AWARE OF (ALTHOUGH, STRICTLY SPEAKING, THAT IS SOMETHING FOR YOU, NOT HER, TO DISCLOSE). HONESTLY, I THINK SHE MADE HERSELF LOOK A BIT OF A FOOL IN THAT EMAIL, RATHER THAN DEMEANING YOU.
***
CLICK MY EGGZ && BABY DRAGONZ, YO!

Adopt one today! Adopt one today! Adopt one today! Adopt one today! Adopt one to
day!

[ LADY PUCKStar|0 likes] [|reply]

I have to agree with puck.

her email wasnt very professional

♥Lacy

[ღMonsoonStar|0 likes] [|reply]

Yes, you are too nice...
But that does not apply in this situation.
It may not have been the most professional thing for her to do, but if she was simply using your blindness as a reference point for those who know you as 'the blind guy' then she was not intending to be insulting or degrating. Saying that you are the blind guy is like saying that I am the girl with the bad back. Does that mean that you are not Jonathan? Or that I am not Jodi? Nope. Those are characteristics. Sometimes we use race as the reference point, sometimes it is weight... You get my drift.
As long as you weren't offended, that's all that matters.
And I really hope that you're able to get someone to supervise you. At least she's trying to assit you, which is better than being a huge bitch and not doing anything for you at all, right? lol

[~*Jodi*~Star|0 likes] [|reply]

you handled it well dear the problem with our society right now is that we've become to hypersensitive to the idea of sounding like we're discriminating against someone or offending them that we end up not dealing with the real cases. I think you realize that and you are such an awesome guy

[angel.without.wingsStar|0 likes] [|reply]


OH YES, YO, I AGREE. SHE HAD TO DISTINGUISH YOU. ALTHOUGH SAYING 'THE BLIND GUY, OOPS, WAIT, THAT SOUNDS RUDE, SRY, I MEAN THE GUY IN THE COUNSELLING CENTRE' ISN'T REALLY THE BEST WAY OF DOING IT! MAYBE SOMETHING LIKE 'REMEMBER THE RELIEF STAFF IN THE COUNSELLING CENTRE WHO WAS BLIND?'
***
CLICK MY EGGZ && BABY DRAGONZ, YO!

Adopt one today! Adopt one today! Adopt one today! Adopt one today! Adopt one today!

[ LADY PUCKStar|0 likes] [|reply]

RYC; I don't think I would be offended if they called me 'the girl in the wheelchair' but I would tell them in the future that I would like to be referred to as Lacy and my position that I work as. lol I don't like when people single me out because of my disability. I could see her maybe telling someone that face to face, but like Puck said, it's an email, she could have worded it better and left out the whole blind thing.

♥Lacy

[ღMonsoonStar|0 likes] [|reply]

previous entry: "From Entrapment  To Infinity" *poem !WARNING!

next entry: Last night, I felt old

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