Smile...
Okay, wow, please don’t kill me. I know this is like my second one tonight. Well techinically, I am not going to post this until tomorrow… or at the very least after I get some sleep. But still, I am in the mood to write it now, so write it I shall. So I decided that I wanted to look up dreams…again. Sigh… I know, I know. I am just so weird.
Well, so lately I have been wanting to research this one dream that I had several weeks ago. My lord, it was amazing, but not in any real good way. It was a horror dream. I would not say it was a nightmare… now because I was not scared of it. I mean when I woke up it freaked me out, but it was not that kind of dream where you hide under the covers and tremble and just want to get back to sleep. No, no, I don’t really have those kind of dreams. I have not had those kind of dreams in a long time.
Though, maybe that is where it all started. I still remember the VERY first dream that I ever remembered. It was a nightmare and it was very strange. I was on vacation with my family and we went to this hotel and it was just like our house but it wasn’t. And these monsters started appearing and chasing us and attacking us and we ended up in what is my parent’s bedroom but was just the room we were staying at the time. And there were vampires and all these other creatures that really scared me when I was 5. I mean there was more to the dream. I KNOW there was, but it has faded over time. Like I know it was storming out and the house was real run down, and it was very… kind of like I know what you did last Summer or Scream. Then again that is just about the time those movies came out, 12 years ago, right?
And then I remember the first dream that I woke up crying from. And actually the only one really. It was about 2 of our dogs, they were outside dogs. And well this tornado was coming and so I was trying to get the dogs inside and not only was it a tornado but this virus/disease was spreading that was making the dogs just like fall apart, like if you pulled apart a Barbie doll. It was so weird, and creepy, and I hated it. It made me so sad.
I can also tell you that, I had a lot of dreams involving wolves. See, I had seen Pet Cemetery 2 when I was little, and that movie was like THE WORST… EVER!! I had a dream that wolves like the dog from the movie came into my room and were attacking me, and then I had a dream that a dog and a cat were running across the fields towards my house to get me, and that wolves were attacking my grandparents house while I was there. And yeah… that movie messed with my head.
The only, non-nightmare dream that I remember from when I was little had Power Rangers in it. IT WAS SO COOL!! And then for the past 3 years… at least. I think more than that, maybe 4 or 5 years I have just always remembered my dreams. Now yes, I have not actually remembered all of them, and I really should write them down. But I am just so lazy.
But back onto my point. I do not have a lot of nightmare dreams anymore and everyone says that I am so weird because I have such vivid dreams. I am serious, I can easily spend half an hour describing a dream, and even then the other person still won’t completely understand. Like just last night I had this real vivid and detailed dream about a giant squid. I think I already mentioned this before, but yeah… just giant squid… in a pool… killing EVERYONE!!!
The scary part is that I swear I had a dream just like it before, and this hasn’t been the first dream like that. I mean, if I wanted to I could easily tell you 20 dreams that I have had. Not all of them will be extremely detailed it might just be something like ‘Hey, I had this dream once where a dinosaur was attacking my house.’ And that will be it, but in my head there is more than that but I can’t really explain it.
Dreams have kind of become my thing. I tell people if I dream about them, because I do. I have lots of dreams of where I work and people from there and lots of dreams with friends. Not so many dreams with teachers of mine in it but it does happen. And everyone thinks that is so weird and perverted and it is not. It is just… I don’t know. I can’t tell you how my brain works and how it thinks. I do not know why Supervisor A has been in more dreams that Supervisor B, or why I have had a dreams that had Teacher D instead of Teacher K. For instance, my Art teacher, she is prolly by favorite teacher, and she has been in more dreams than my other teacher. Then my P.E. teacher was in that real creepy dream that was a horror dream, and I do not know why. I don’t know why Laura (one of my supervisor) always seems to be in my dreams with David (another one of my supervisors… I hate david.). And then sometimes it is just random people and everyone thinks it is so weird like I wanted to dream about them. If I tell you I dream about you it is not supposed to be a good or a bad thing, it is just a statement. It is just me saying ‘Hey I had a dream about you last night. Wanna hear it?’
I’ve actually had one dream where I was a guy! Does that mean that I want to be a dude! No… it just means I was playing a guy in my dream. See… dreams for me are like movies. And I have said this before but I attributed it to writing. Dreams, reading, visualizing for me is like a movie. I see everything. Everything plays out just like a movie, in full blown color and sound. And I am not always…a person. Sometimes I am just this omnipresent being like a camera and I’m not in the eyes of a character. Sometimes I am not even me… but a character. And when I visualize I see everything but I don’t. I can tell you exactly how I see it, but it is weird. It is like I see it but I don’t. If I describe to you a dream or read a line from a book I will see it and I will know exactly how it looks even if you just say brown dog, I will have a brown dog all nice and formed. But maybe I just do it so quickly that the image is just registered in my brain and I don’t dwell on it, or maybe I really don’t visualize all that well… I don’t know. Either way it is like I see the picture and then I don’t all at the same time. I know there is a brown dog, and it will have my own mental image of it but there is more where I don’t need to see it more as I need to know how I did see and how I see it. If that makes any sense at all.
I know, I know. I am always rambling and everything and this one is no different. But dreams, they really intrigue me. I really wish there was a clear-cut reason for why I can remember them so well. I mean it was not like there was anything special. And I remember dreams so well without having to write them down especially for like the first day… not just an hour or ten minutes, but the first day, sometimes even up to the first week depending on how much I liked it before things start to get fuzzy. So tell me, am I weird? Am I weird to remember so much and so many dreams? Am I weird to dream about people I know quite frequently? And if not why do I get weird looks where people wonder what the freak is going on with me.
I mean, I have people ask me what I do before I go to bed. Normally I do not go to bed angry or anything like that. I get tired and go to bed. Sometimes I eat, sometimes I don’t and that really doesn’t affect what I dream. I mean there is the occasional morning where I will wake up and I will remember nothing. But I know I did dream, I have that feeling I just didn’t remember any. And let me tell you that is a rare day. So yeah, sorry about this extremely long entry, and I have changed my mind (obviously) because I am posting it now, instead of later. So yeah, thoughts please. 
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