WhEn PuSh CoMeS tO sHoVe
All right, so this last bit with my car pushed it. I am through. I am through fucking around with 10+ years pieces of junk that hate me. I know, it is a freaking car and it cannot hate me, but that is what happens. Let me list to you everything that has gone wrong (including the 2 things I did) to my cars.
Car 1
Windshield leaked (didn't have to pay for it, dealer fixed it but still)
Fan Motor gave out (so I had no air OR HEAT)
Window got stuck down (at sonic, in the middle of winter)
Sway Bar Broke
Brake Lines Broke
Smashed my passenger mirror (at sonic, I never go there anymore)
Er.... I totaled it.
Car 2
Transmission whined, replaced (but we knew the tranny was crap)
Sway Bar Broke
Now, we have an ERG (or is it EGR) Valve and a Throttle Position sensor thingie to replace.
Oh and the A/C doesn't work but I AM NOT fixing that.
And this was all under 2 years... yeah.... First car I had for a year, but really only drove it for 1 school year (August thru May). This car I've had since that one, but yeah. I literally have no money at all. All of my money goes to gas or my parents and I cannot afford to have a car that I can't count on. I cannot keep worrying what will go wrong the next time I get into my car. I do not want to keep sinking money (or my parents money) into a car that I do not plan on keeping. In fact we (my parents and I) both agreed that I will have a new car by the time I go off to college... so why put money into a car that we won't be keeping anyway? Hmm...? My thoughts EXACTLY.
I know, there are worse cars, WAY worse. But the window, it was not like I was freaking rolling it UP and down, UP and down. It was not like I was beating the crap out of my car, and slammed on the breaks every chance I got, or anything like that. Yeah, I totaled it... I understand that. I went too fast and lost control (and do no even get me started on Sonic and the mirror, because like I said i do not go there, ever. I have not eaten there since that has happened.) Call me a freaking idiotic teenager, call me whatever the hell you what! I just can't stand worrying this much over a car. I want to be able to have some money saved up for college or a rainy day or anything. I can't stand being this stressed out over something that normally wouldn't be so little. The phrase "Mom, dad, I think there might be something wrong with my car," is a death sentence. Its a heartbreaker.
So I am through. My parents and I are going to call around tomorrow and Tuesday to see if I can get a loan for about 11 grand or less. Which gets me a nice 2008 Grand Prix with 30k miles, sunroof, audio steering wheel controls, leather seats, for only 160 a month on a 6 year loan since my parents have great credit. That is my hope because I cannot take this anymore. I feel like I am going to have a nervous breakdown if I don't get away from this car. Hopefully that will be a better car than my others. Hopefully.
UPDATE
Ehh... I forgot the other thing I wanted to say. I'm kinda sad, and depressed but in an odd bi-polary type way. I mean... I am happy but I''m not. I am pissed and stressed over cars, and I am bleh about work and school. But I seem to be growing farther and farther away from people. I want to do something this weekend with my friends.
But you know, it is my friends online that are farther away too. I come online, but no one that I talk to is on. It just feels like everyone disappeared. I know they have lives and problems too and agendas. But you would think someone would be on, if just for 5 minutes. Just so I know that I'm not alone. I'm so pathetic.
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