last night's dream.....

09/27/2013

so i had a dream last night that shook me pretty much to the core. mainly because it is the complete opposite of who i am. we were back at my grandmas, but it was my sister and i, no matthew. well there was this little black puppy there (she looked like a black lab mix) and she was silent, but was all over the house. well i took her into the bathroom, while grandma was sleeping, and i cut off her head. then i went out the front door, hiding her, and went to the back yard. i went to the garage and got a shovel, and i walked over to the side of the garage and dug a shallow grave right between the two rose bushes and put her in there. then i covered her up. no remorse, no tears, no sadness. as i was putting the shovel back in the garage, my sister walks back. asked me what i was doing. i looked at her and said "nothing" and closed the garage door. she goes "how could you?" and you know what i said? "how could i what? i didn't do anything" and walked away. then i woke up. that dream shook me so bad i woke up sweating. that is something i would NEVER do because i am not that cruel and i love dogs. i usually don't dream, and when i do it normally has some sort of meaning behind it. we don't own any black dogs, we have a white pitt in the house, but shes not even really mine. i own two guinea pigs and my husband and i now have an 8week old kitten. no dogs. which leads me to think "is there really some part of me that would, COULD do something so horrible? if so, im glad she is chained inside me and hope she stays that way...