hey all, sorry i haven't been on in a while. life's been crazy.
new developments:
my niece came to us on January 6th, 2014. my sister is doing real well considering. no one still likes her "fiance" and he doesn't like any of us *i have my own opinions on him....* the pictures i have seen are just too cute! although i still haven't seen her since the day after she was born. our aunt sees her all the time but no one else in the family has. i blame my sister's fiance for that. he doesn't like anyone in her family but her. it sucks cuz she's my first niece and i can't even see the baby.
we now have 2 cats not just one, the other one we got from my sister when she moved into her current house and she is adorable! we ended up with cleopatrah (cleo for short) when my sister gave her to my aunt, and her and the cat already living there didn't get along too well. so my grandma ended up with her. well i took the cat because i knew grandma could not handle her in the house with the dog and bird already. we've had her ever since. she is warming up to me incredibly well, but she is still very skittish around people. still working on that.
theresa is back in the picture, and she is playing every single person i care about. everyone seems to think she has changed, and granted she's putting on an academy award performance, but i can still see through her charade. she used the same mask on me that she is now using on everyone else. grandma had $100 come up missing on christmas day, when theresa had access to the money alone for about five minutes, and she is also missing $40+ in rolled change, same circumstances, theresa having access to it, and $150 just a few days ago. yet theresa suddenly comes into a little sum of money. suspicious? definitely. thinks she fesses up to it? no.
hubby and i are alright. we aren't doing too bad lately, even though i have had a lot of stuff on my mind.
my cousin has been having a rough time lately. they recently put her on Abilify (which they are now taking her off of). within the last six weeks she has tried to take her life a total of 5 times. the parents finally listened to what my husband was saying and are taking her off of it. her sister is having a rough time with this as well. i try to help but i'm reaching out into thin air it seems. i hear the same voices she does, but i am not on the medicine that she is.
we moved back in with my grandma last weekend. she's been falling and having stuff coming up missing a lot so we moved back in to keep an eye on her more. make sure she is alright. neither hubby nor myself trust the people coming in and out of this house.
my mood has been in the dumps a lot lately. i feel like i just wanna go away. i keep trying to reach out to family and no one is there. my grandma is the only one who actually wants to see family. no one wants anything to do with you until you can serve their purpose or they are in trouble. i can't take that anymore. there was a time when i almost played frogger just to lose the game. i just wanna go. no one cares here. i feel myself slipping. mentally. i can feel me losing control of everything. idk i just don't want to be here. i want to not be here more than i want to be. i'm just really depressed a lot lately and i don't wanna be around anything or anyone. idk maybe it's just me or what but i don't wanna do anything. oh well. just gotta deal with it like i always do. with a smile. |
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