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~♥ Today I'm Thankful For... A new breath of life.
~♥ On My Blog: Haven't updated recently.
~♥ For Sale in My eBay Boutique: Mostly Lalaloopsy and Squinkies items.
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I haven't updated recently. I've been too busy living life. I plan to update more with this wonderful new year. We had a pretty good Christmas, only a few tough days but not as bad as last year. New Year's Eve I went to a friend's house for a party and it didn't end like planned, but I had fun for a time and I learned from it. That's what really matters!
I have felt a huge change in myself. As I've opened myself up to more, I've felt more peace and happiness. I don't want to let my past influence me anymore. I don't want to live life in a jaded mentality, always expecting the worst. I want to look forward to everything and have hope for the best! When I stopped trying to do what everyone else thought I should do and focused on what *I* want and need, it gave me so much freedom! I am not going to fit in the mold anyone else tries to put me in. I'm me, and I have many facets, so I cannot fit into just one box. And my life is not about doing what others want, it's about living for me. So that's what I'm going to do. I'm going to date, watch action movies, listen to silly pop music, wear make up, dress in clothes that flatter me, spend time with people I like, drink when I want to, have sex with my boyfriend if I want to (yep Christians feel free to freak out on that one), follow MY faith as I see fit - not how anyone or any church dictates me to, discover the beauty in other faiths, find full on peace with the past, chase new possibilities, try new things, get more tattoos or piercings if I want to, go out when I can, find a career *I* love and want, follow my dreams, do the things I love, and work on being the best ME possible!
Walking away from that horrible church and those awful people was one of the best things I've done, and one of the most freeing. I felt trapped there. I felt like if I didn't submit to their will I was mistreated and made out as a bad guy. That isn't healthy. The people in "churches" do worse stuff than people who don't go to them, and they do it in hiding because they can't be honest with who they are. They choose to restrict themselves based on someone else's rules and then commit secret sins because those rules are meant for them. I choose not to be a part of that. I choose to follow my faith on my own terms. I choose to teach my child true faith, love, hope, consideration, and character through our own path. I am excited to look into other belief systems such as Buddhism and Taoism, which have teachings that have such an undertone of peace. I find the "religion" path is led my control, condemnation, judgment, hate, conformity, uniformity, obedience, greed, and ego-stroking. That is not something I want to be a part of or teach my child about. That is nothing Jesus was about. And yet this is how 90% of "churches" are. I want to find true faith, a balanced faith that is deep and meaningful, with true heart and true value. I look forward to this new path!
I'm really excited for this year! I feel a lot of changes are already happening and we aren't even a week in yet! I look forward to seeing where this year goes and the different paths we take. I'm excited to bring some magic back into my life! I want to live a life where I look forward to the unknown possibilities waiting around the corner, where I walk with joy in my step, and where I have a twinkle in my eye. I want to bring hope, joy, excitement, hope, love, dreams, and wonder back into my life! I want to let the past be dead and gone where it is, learn from it and value the good from it, but not let the bad hold me back anymore. I want to be completely open to what life has to offer! I want to be truly free! This is the year for that, and I am so excited for it! :*D
⊱ ღ Belle Ivy Rose ⊰
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This is like reading an entry from a totally different person, the positivity just shines through. Idk, I never thought of you as particularly negative, but this entry is just so happy. I'm happy you're happy.
