A few years ago I was sad. I know now that I was depressed and probably needed help. But I didn't' talk about it. I just made a plan. I was tried of being sad all the time... Tired of life. So I worked it out in my head that if I hurt myself at a certain time the next day, that there wouldn't be anyone home to find me in time to save me. I went to sleep with this in my head the thought that I was going to die the next day didn't bother me at all.
When I slept I began to dream. I was sitting on a sofa in the uptairs area of my house with a friend of mine who had passed away when I was in high school. It was strange but comforting at the same time. Eventually she liked at me and smiled sadly. I asked her what was wrong.
"I have to go soon." she said, "So there's something I need to tell you. I know it hurts sometimes. And I know it's hard. But you can't leave yet. You need to stay."
It was then I started to hear kids laughing and playing in the other room. My friend smiled when a little girl came running into the room and hugged her. The little girl looked almost exactly like I had as a child.
"You can't leave yet, Babe. You've got shit to do." my friend laughed.
When I woke up that morning I felt better than I had in months. And I went to my mom and asked her to help me find a therapist.
I guess my secret is that my dead friend saved my life. |
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