Hey- its been a while since I've been here. I feel like its been forever anyway. I guess my life just got busy and I SHOULD have been here to tell about it because I definitely could have used some advice and support.
First of all, I did go to a psychic. I only went once, and while I'd like to go back again I know that I really should be spending my money on other things. Anyway, I did a tarot card and psychic reading combo, and no she did not fix the tarot cards as I shuffled them myself three times. Basically she said that judging from my cards and my reading, I have so much goodness, success and overall positivity in my life its unbelievable. She said that unfortunately, the cards were all facing away from me which meant that while they are here, they weren't mine to have. She said it was like going through a tunnel and coming to the light at the end, but suddenly as soon as you feel the sun's warmth on your skin someone pushes you right back into the tunnel. She also said that many people that I have let into my life are intent on manipulation and enjoy seeing me fail, so if I intend to accomplish anything I should keep it to myself. She said so many more things... this is just a part of it. She didn't know my name so she couldn't look me up on facebook or anything, but she knew so much about me. She knew so much about my past it's unbelievable, and I cried all the way home because I guess I felt like while she basically said that as of now nothing good is coming my way, I felt like someone finally really understands me. Someone can really see me. And yeah, I know how crazy this all sounds.
I haven't been eating right or exercising either... I tried to get back in the dating game and I guess I figured that whoever I was dating needed to like me for me because I needed to like me for me. And then I realized that even though I'm over Eric, I compare everyone to Eric, which means that nobody is good enough. Like, while everyone is good enough personality wise, nobody is good enough physically. So I decided I wasn't ready to date after all. And at one point, Eric trapped me again and said he was sorry and wanted to move to PA together because he's transferring to a new school in PA. And shortly thereafter my son called Eric "Daddy". So.. I guess now I'm moving again, with Eric, to PA. Hopefully this will be a new start for both of us but to be honest I'm not feeling this anymore. I'm not really feeling anyone else either.
I need to start exercising again, so I will. My whole body aches from eating so much crap last night... Eric and I had a gaming night. I reactivated my retail WoW subscription- I've been playing on a private server and I just couldn't stand it anymore- I HAD to make a goblin! He got the midnight release of the new call of duty so he was up playing that. To me it looks exactly like the other game but I understand that getting new games when they are released is part of the fun. Today my goal is just to drink a lot of water, that way hopefully all this salt thats caused me to be so bloaty and achy will wash out of my system.
So on an unrelated note, anyone following the shows American Horror Story or Grimm? I'm not sure how I feel about Grimm, but I think I'm loving American Horror Story. |
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