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We Are Who We Choose to Be
by .Ad.Infinitum.

previous entry: Something Old, Something New, Something Used, And...

next entry: Slowly, For Better or For Worst.

When Life Gives You Lemons...

09/20/2011

I feel hopeful for my future. My family said they would help me get a car, and the agreement is that if they buy it for me I'll pay it back as I get my college disbursement checks. That way if I have my own car, which boyfriend owns the car even though I was making payments on it... Anyway, if I have my OWN car, I can get my OWN job, and put my son in daycare which is the last thing I want to do but it would do him good to be in a more structured environment with other kids his age. Then through it all, I can get my own place away from Boyfriend. I don't want to leave him, but he can't ever trust that I won't flip out on him again and I can't ever trust that I'm the only object of his affection... especially when affection is the one thing I'm not getting, and the only thing that matters. Not to mention that he says at this point he doesn't even know what he wants to do as far as our relationship goes, or how he feels about me. I feel like I'm being punished for something that isn't entirely my fault. I'm not saying that hitting anyone is ever justifiable, but I felt like I was backed into a corner.

On my journey to self improvement, I decided I want to lose 100lbs. I've started the P90 program, and I've tried to make diet changes slowly. For instance, I tend to snack on awful things and drink a lot of soda. So this week I've made a pact to drink protein shakes to help fight my late night hunger and give my body the nutrition it actually needs. I've also substituted all of my sugary drinks for water.

I also made a calender so I can follow my P90 program. The P90 is the prequel to P90x, which I heard kicks your ass and has great results. To be honest, this will be my third day doing it and I feel good. I can do a lot more than I thought I could do, and its nice having some real direction. When I follow along with the program, I feel like I have my very own personal trainer at home. The best thing I like about it so far is that the guy who leads the workouts always says that if we need a break, that's what the pause button is for. A lot of workout videos and DVDS have some skinny bitch telling you to keep it up, great job so on and so forth. That irritates the hell out of me. No way can I move like you do, with your flat abs and toned legs. Haha I think there is too much fat on my body to even be ABLE to flex in the way that you do. With P90, the leader tells you to take a break, get some water, go slow if you need to and as long as you are moving and following along with the program that's good enough for him. I like that. He's very motivational.

Anyway, I'll keep you posted on how things change as I go on these 90 days. I will be weighing myself every Saturday. I started out 230 pounds. Women fluctuate 5-10 points here and there because we're gifted. My goal is to be 140-150 pounds. I could really use a support team!

What diets/supplements/workouts helped you?

previous entry: Something Old, Something New, Something Used, And...

next entry: Slowly, For Better or For Worst.

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i've been following a (slightly modified) version of the south beach diet. essentially lower carbs, more protein, less processed crap, and making sure i eat breakfast. i've lost 25 or so lbs without really missing anything.

[girlsetsfireStar|0 likes] [|reply]

I try to drink a protein shake for breakfast because I usually can't bring myself to eat anything. Carbs are my life though... I love rice, noodles and bread. Yummy! I'm making slow changes though, so I hope by the end of this to have enough willpower to eat entirely how I'm supposed to.

[.Ad.Infinitum.|0 likes] [|reply]

I'm afraid to even touch either the P90 or the P90x. I have lost about 70 pounds in the past 5-6 months just by walking. I work as a hostess at the Olive Garden. And I know you're thinking of asking if it's hard with all the food around. The answer is, no. After being around it, you tend to become sick of it. Anyhow, I have been able to lose it through walking and drinking only water. Also...though I'm not proud of it, I tend to not have the time to eat - so I am left to starve myself. I need a better way around the weight loss, however, once I can find the time to eat, I will find the time to do this regimen properly.

[Kristin with an i|0 likes] [|reply]

I can relate! I don't have the time to eat during the day so I tend to eat a bunch of crap at night, partially because I don't feel like cooking. That's another reason why I wanted to start drinking protein shakes... I needed to give my body something to live off of that would help prevent me from being hungry around midnight.

[.Ad.Infinitum.|0 likes] [|reply]

Oh, and now I want some Olive Garden. Thank you VERY much.

[.Ad.Infinitum.|0 likes] [|reply]

i like that, despite the problems you are faced with, you started this entry with hope for your future.

i do a variety of things to workout because i get bored with the same routine over and over. yoga (which i absolutely love), pilates, a few of jillian michale's dvds (which kick my ass), kickboxing, rock climbing, biking, etc. keeping it fun and switching things up keeps me motivated

[Half way to Anywhere|0 likes] [|reply]

Haha I always tell everyone that Jillian Michaels kicked my ass. I tried to follow along to a DVD once and I couldn't sit or stand right for about a week. It was terrible!

[|reply]

it's true!! you can't move even the slightest bit with out pain for about the first month, but you do start to get really good results if you can stick with it. i remember the first few days i was starting one of her dvds thinking to myself, "i've discovered the reason why you lose weight... the thought of eating makes you want to puke!" jillian is a crazy bitch, but she does get results.

[Half way to Anywhere|0 likes] [|reply]

I need a support team, too! I lost 30 lbs but the last 10 were really hard... and I ended up gaining 8 lbs back so I still have 18 to my goal.

I don't consider my diet "a diet," it's just what I eat. If you want me to elaborate on any of these things, please ask! I love talking about food (: But this is more or less how I eat:
- raw veggies as much as possible.
- few carbs... gradual is a good idea. This was hard for me.
- less meat- 0-3 meals per week.
- 2 liters of water or more a day. I only drink water, beer, and sometimes tea. Juice is a rare thing reserved for when I am sick.
- small meals. I usually have 5-7 meals/snacks a day.

Working out:
- I started just walking. At least 15 minutes per day and built up from there.
- There are many things I can't do because of physical limitations. But I do modified yoga, moderate hikes, and I have 2- 5- and 10- lb dumbbells and an exercise ball for upper body strength. I used to swim and that helped a lot.
- I interned at a farm. I know this is a random thing but I lost 20 lbs this summer just doing manual labor for 25 hours per week. And it wasn't even THAT hard of labor, because there are a lot of farm tasks I can't do based on my injuries, but it still helped me a lot to be up and on my feet instead of on the couch. I also have my own garden which helps me get off my butt even though it's not as strenuous as farm work.

Good luck and congrats on turning over a new leaf! It is definitely the time of year for transition

[mixie|0 likes] [|reply]

Yeah I should probably pick up some raw veggies and snack on them next time I go grocery shopping. That is a good idea. Its hard sometimes to make the right decisions food wise because I'm trying to feed a family of junk food junkies. I try to feed my son balanced meals, but of course he can eat the fun stuff like chicken nuggets and fries when I can't. I don't like the idea of preparing a meal for them and then a meal for myself, but maybe if I start snacking during the day I won't feel so compelled to eat a traditional dinner like I make for the boys.

[.Ad.Infinitum.|0 likes] [|reply]

My mom's a personal trainer and my parents own a fitness center, which I used to manage until I got a different job. My boyfriend and I are going to start the P90X training and diet next week. /dies.

Make sure you eat enough, make sure you get enough nutrients and protein. Do not starve yourself, it's stupid and does nothing but eat your muscles. Eat 3 times a day, have 2 snacks. You can "cheat" and have a soda here and there, just take those calories into consideration.

Most of my calorie intake comes from soda. I'm a horrible eater because I'm poor right now, lol. But I do eat sandwiches for lunch, carbs and protein for supper. I can't NOT eat. I'm always snacking on nuts of some sort.

I'm glad you've got a plan for your life. xoxo,

[jessica;x♥Star|0 likes] [|reply]

My big weakness is coffee! Good thing I don't work in a starbucks, otherwise I would be in big, big trouble. I did switch to fat-free coffee creamer, but my problem is that I drink so much coffee that either I forget to eat, or I'm just too full to eat. My parents are fitness freaks... my mom went through this thing where she lived off of supplements and protein shakes, with some baked chicken breasts thrown in there and she lost MASSIVE weight. She lost so much weight that I gave her all MY skinny clothes! Its shameful, but good her her. Haha

[.Ad.Infinitum.|0 likes] [|reply]

Yeah, my mom doesn't do the supplements or protein shakes. She just eats right and works out. She took pictures for her brochures two years ago, I think, and she told him that she wanted NO editting to it. Just her. She's ripped, but not in a gross way!

[jessica;x♥Star|0 likes] [|reply]

previous entry: Something Old, Something New, Something Used, And...

next entry: Slowly, For Better or For Worst.

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