You know when a family is as grown apart when you don't even get to see your brother on his birthday. My brother turned 25 today, isn't that suppose to be a big birthday. I know when I turn 25 I am going to want to have at least a dinner with my family. But no we didn't get to see him today/night because he went out to dinner with his girlfriend instead. How messed up is that??
What makes things worse is tomorrow is my boyfriends birthday he is going to be 23. Every year is family have this huge birthday dinner, they celebrate everyone ones birthday with a special dinner or party. KNowing this makes me even madder about my own family. Is that a bad thing??
The good thing is that it means that there is a good chance that I will finally see my man. Since it is pretty much a requirement for me to go to this dinner. Its not like I don't mind going over his house but it is always crazy over there. He lives with four younger children that are wild, at least over the years they have grown up and calmed down a little but now they are abusive to each other. And I know that I should be more comfortable there since I have been dating him for 5 years now but because I am such a quite person I just end up sitting in the corner some where. How bad does that sound??
There are so many times in my life that I wish I could be out there but I just can't seem to break out of my shell. Its really bad when you meet someone for the first time and from then on all they say to you is that you are so quite. Nobody ever thinks that maybe I just don't have anything to say. |
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