Ok- I'm reading the Belle de Jour book at the moment, diary of a call girl- now admittedly diary of a Drama teacher is not normally as exciting in the mind let alone on paper but I feel like my diaries have lost the energy and craziness of younger days... I just tend to prattle on about what I've done with my day and leave the gory (an prob most exciting) bits out!
Last night was the dress rehearsal for Bugsy, little nervous- so many kids are doing OK but not great- and it's a week away now, if it looks bad it means I look bad as well, not good! But just like with Children of Eden, I keep thinking- it's over in a week and then I officially get my life back!
Today is mine and Adam's 3 month anniversary- for me that's like a sneeze in the relationship time scale but it's still kind of important that someone's been able to put up with me for that long!! We're going to the Ice Bar tonight, I'm so determined that I don't want to become one of those rut couples who just does the same thing every week etc, so need to keep him on his toes lol! My heart now fully reigns over my head in the relationship, and if it wasn't for my OCD coming into play I think we'd be actually perfect... can't wait for the house viewing on Saturday, Bex and I were perusing all the other ones last night; planning the future is now an exciting not a scary prospect!
Although money is taking over my current life worries- I just about have enough to live on every month and I've got Holly from uni bugging me about saving up for LA and the USA next year- being honest I don't know if I'll have enough money- not if I'm moving house and we're considering getting married etc...
I'll know more by next year, and I've already planned for a relatively cheap wedding day etc so it could work... Adam's not happy at the idea of being away from me for so long, I just don't know which dream has reality stamped on it and which has 'pipe' on!
We also talked last night about the difference between 'making love' and 'having sex'... I mentally/ physically know the difference, but how to define it???! I'd like to be able to count the number of men I've 'made love to' rather than 'had sex with' as the number'd be much smaller!
Got my final observation as an NQT today as well- I've already received my notice saying I've passed anyway but I still have to have this last observation according to protocol, what a waste of time! I'm so not fully prepared but I'm not of the mindset right now where I care!
Love Fallen xx |
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