Ok well its two weeks exactly til we break up for the summer holidays- I'm worse than the kids counting down the days, and it's a bit sad that I'll never teach some of those kids again! Its a little annoying that I don't have any of the same classes next year as I did this year for the sheer fact that I feel like I've trained my kids up now to be how I want them to be- the classes I taught this year that I had last year are just so much more on the ball, they're quite quicker, they get what I'm talking about, they know the protocol for my lessons- it's great!
On a separate note, I keep having dreams about past loves at the moment, it's kind of getting to me- I don't know how I'm still in a completely dyfunctional relationship- i know at the centre of it, it's because I'm a coward... as much as people think I'm a bitch I really don't like breaking hearts, i'd rather someone broke up with me then I broke up with them... I took it to an extreme last night- saying I didn't like sex with him anymore, and... nothing!! Its not cool- i want to kick myself daily, or rather kick him. it's like every little thing he does somehow annoys me, or isn't right. I know I've never been this picky before, so I don't get why I'm being this way. Basically I think I need to have made the move by America or I'll be plagued with guilt all while I'm out there. It's not like I'm very good at being faithful whilst in the same country!
On that note, seeing Lucien again- I love that I now have the 1 up on him, knowing that he has a girlfriend but tht he still wants to be a couple when we're together makes me smile, but also makes me feel better! Right well my schedule is hectic as ever, I'm broke as ever- and feel guilty cos I just ate a jacket potato- my diet of fruit and healthyness is going out the window (I know that a jacket potato isn't like chocolate or anything, but its too bulky)! My gm quota is down for the week as well, not good- so going tonight before the school play!
love Fallen xxx |
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