GOSH, YO - YOU MEAN IT WON'T OFFEND ANYONE AT ALL? I WAS AT LEAST HOPING FOR A FEW 'OMGWTF, I SO DO NOT WANT TO SHAG STEVE, YO! I HATE KEL FOR BONA FIDE REASONS THAT DO NOT INVOLVE JEALOUSY OF HER SEXY HUBBY!' TYPE COMMENTS! ;D

I didn't say you wouldn't get such comments. ;-) You most likely will, given what we know of Bloopers. Doesn't mean what you said isn't profound and absolutely correct.

I agree. Estella said just what I was thinking.

I do get where you are coming from. I didn't mean people deserve to be raped, that wasn't what I was trying to put across. I'm probably just as bad with words as the others, but yeah, I'm not saying she deserved it. Just that it seems to me that they should have been more cautious after the first time, and maybe you should get to know someone better before putting yourself in a private situation where (soft) rape could occur from your partner.

Not to start anything, but men who abuse their spouses, and thus rape them, are VERY VERY VERY good at hiding who they really are until they know they have you hooked. I have known men who were perfectly charming and very sweet for the entire time they were dating their future spouse, and for a couple of them that would have been at least 2 years. But as soon as they got married, things changed. You CAN'T ALWAYS know someone well enough before you marry them, because sometimes they are just THAT GOOD at pretending.

That's happened to two of my aunts...it ruined their lives because at that point, they were too scared or too ashamed to try to get out.

I DON'T THINK IT'S ABOUT PRIVACY THOUGH. LIKE, MY UNDERSTANDING OF THIS KIND OF RAPE IS THAT IT'S MORE A COUPLE GOING TO BED TOGETHER AND THE GUY SAYING 'YO, I WANT SOME RUMPY PUMPY' AND THE GIRL SAYING 'NO, I DON'T FEEL LIKE IT', AND THE GUY SAYING 'TOUGH, YO!' LIKE, IT'S ENTIRELY POSSIBLE THEY HAVE HAD CONSENSUAL SEX BEFORE AND THAT THE GUY ASSUMES THE GIRL WILL ALWAYS WANT IT AND THE GIRL DOESN'T ALWAYS WANT IT. A LOT CAN HINGE ON MISCOMMUNICATION - QUITE DIFFERENT FROM A RANDOM STRANGER JUMPING OUT OF A BUSH AND RAPING SOMEONE. OFTEN THE GIRL DOESN'T EVEN SEE IT AS RAPE UNTIL AFTERWARDS ANYWAY. I MEAN, THERE ARE MANY THINGS THAT SOMEONE CAN COERCE SOMEONE INTO DOING, AND WHICH AREN'T SEEN AS A BIG DEAL - BUT WITH SEX, ANY LEVEL OF THIS IS NOW CLASSED AS RAPE.

That's insane. Like, I've totally raped Steve loads of times then. I didn't realise I was breaking the law!

Kel, if consensual "mock rape" is what you are speaking of, that is one thing. But just because someone is married doesn't mean they didn't get raped by their partner, and just because someone has spent even years getting to know someone doesn't mean they will get to know the real person before they a mrry them, if in fact that man is the kind of man of which I speak. THAT is the angle MY comment was coming from.

He didn't say yes, and he even said no and didn't want me to do it, but I still did it. So I guess it's still rape. He wasn't happy about it. Who knows.

You appear to be COMPLETELY missing my point.

I get your point, I just think people get way too into this, and that wasn't really the point of this entire thread anyway.

You're right, it wasn't. However, the point of this thread WAS to point out to you where you say things that could be taken offensively, was it not? I was pointing out to you where a statement you made (as I quoted above) could be taken offensively and WHY it could be taken offensively.

No, it was about things from BEFORE that. I said it in the original post.

I DON'T THINK THE THREAD CAN WORK LIKE THAT, YO, KEL. PEOPLE IN GENERAL HAVE SHORT MEMORIES. THEY MAY HAVE DECIDED IN THEIR MINDS YEARS AGO THAT THEY DON'T LIKE YOU, AND THEY'VE PROBABLY FORGOTTEN WHY. BUT HEY PRESTO - SUDDENLY YOU MAKE SOME UNWISE SWEEPING COMMENT IN THE HEAT OF THE MOMENT AND THOSE PEOPLE NOW HAVE A NEW CONCRETE REASON TO HATE ON YOU! IT'S ALL ABOUT THE PRESENT, YO.

AND THEN THERE ARE PEOPLE LIKE MISSING CHAYA ELIANA WHO PROBABLY WERE NEVER AWARE OF YOU BEFORE BUT WHO TOOK GENUINE OFFENCE AT YOUR COMMENT IN DEAR ANON AND WHO WISH TO TALK ABOUT IT WITH YOU. SUCH PEOPLE ARE THE ONLY ONES WHO WILL TALK TO YOU LOGICALLY.

AS I SAID BEFORE, YOUR HATERZ WILL NOT WANT TO SORT THINGS OUT. THEY ARE DELIGHTED YOU'VE PROVED YOUR 'EVILNESS' BY SAYING SOMETHING BAD. THEY'RE RELISHING THE DRAMA. YOU'RE WASTING YOUR TIME ASKING THEM TO APPROACH YOU. THE ONLY PEOPLE WHO WILL WANT TO SORT THINGS OUT ARE GENUINE PEOPLE WHO REALLY DIDN'T LIKE WHAT YOU SAID. SURELY THEY ARE THE PEOPLE IT'S BETTER TO INTERACT WITH ANYWAY.

Okay, so the whole point of this was because STEVE said people have sent tickets in about ME in the past (within the last 6 months), which I said there shouldn't be any reason, because for the most part - I've been sticking to my faves and my own diary. I just wanted to know what the things I did that would be "worth of ticket raising" were, because obviously whatever they were - they were ridiculous in my eyes and I never would have thought that someone would complain about it.

Yes, I know that people are whining about the other week, their feelings are hurt, whatever. I said specifically not from then, and I'm past that sitch. So if there is still nothing out there from the last six months - whatev I guess!

IF STEVE IS SAYING THIS AND BRINGING IT UP WITH YOU AS A POINT OF CONTENTION, HE SHOULD SHOW YOU THE TICKETS, YO. THEN YOU CAN WORK THROUGH THE SPECIFICS TOGETHER. YOU NEED THE ORIGINAL EVIDENCE FOR IT TO MEAN ANYTHING. BESIDES, THE PEOPLE IN QUESTION MAY HAVE LEFT BLOOP OR THEY MAY NOT READ THE FORUMS.

WELL, LIKE, NORMALLY IN THESE CASES IT'S NOT A FUN THING. LIKE THERE IS A GENUINE CONTROL/FORCE THING GOING ON.

TO GIVE AN ANALOGY, THERE ARE PARENTS WHO JOKE ABOUT BEATING THEIR KIDS, AND PRETEND TO, AS A JOKE, AND THE KIDS KNOW IT'S A JOKE AND IT'S ALL IN GOOD HUMOUR AND SILLINESS AND THE KIDS FEEL SAFE. AND THEN THERE ARE THE PARENTS WHO GENUINELY DO BEAT THEIR KIDS, AND IT'S NOT A JOKE AND IT'S NOT IN GOOD HUMOUR, AND THE KIDS ARE SCARED SHITLESS.

once agian..he wasn't my partner.....please show me were I said he was my partner.

and no means no...be it brutal or whatever else.

And as for after the first time..I was a child when I was molseted...you think I was thinking of that then?

Well....I never said he was my partneer...ever. Not once. I said he was a guy I met through people I THOUGHT were fiiends at the time.

And I just don't see how I put myself in a situation TO be raped when I went out thinking the people I was with were friends.

OH, OKAY. WELL, YOUR COMMENTS WERE A BIT VAGUE AND CRYPTIC, SO I WAS READING BETWEEN THE LINES AND THINKING THAT'S WHAT YOU MEANT, YO. OBVIOUSLY, NONE OF US CAN KNOW WHAT REALLY HAPPENED WITH YOU, SO TAKE MY POST AS A SORT OF GENERALISED THING WHICH ADDRESSES KEL'S GENERALISED COMMENTS ABOUT WOMEN WHO PUT THEMSELVES IN SUCH SITUATIONS. THAT IS WHAT PEOPLE ARE MOSTLY CONCERNED ABOUT - THAT KEL'S COMMENT WAS GENERALISING ABOUT ALL WOMEN WHO GET RAPED MORE THAN ONCE. IT'S NOT REALLY ABOUT YOU ANY MORE - IT'S BECOME A MUCH WIDER THING, WHERE PEOPLE ARE OFFENDED ON BEHALF OF ALL RAPED WOMEN. SO WHETHER OR NOT HE WAS YOUR PARTNER IS IRRELEVANT REALLY. SOME PEOPLE ARE RAPED BY THEIR PARTNERS. SOME ARE RAPED BY FRIENDS. SOME BY FRIENDS OF FRIENDS. SOME BY FAMILY MEMBERS. AND SOME BY COMPLETE STRANGERS.

I agree to that.
Just take a stand back and be yourself and not give a shit who is saying what about you.
If you dont keep it going, everything will blow over.

Drama is drama, and the only way it will end is if you dont let it get to your real life and if you just ignore it.
Unless... ur guilty of being horribly mean to someone on Bloop and for whatver reason you still hold a grudge against them, or against what you have done to them.

I'm about to say something that may not go over very well with Steve, but HE shouldn't be letting what people say about you affect your personal life together. Why? Because this is an online site. Not real life. This site is WORK, and WORK should not be "taken home with you", which is PRECISELY what is happening if the Bloop drama is affecting your relationship IRL together. They are complaining about the actions of STAFFER/BLOOPER Kel-sy, not IRL Kelly. The both of you need to just walk away from the drama that is ensuing because of things you said in Bloop.

MAYBE Steve needs to post something stating exactly what I stated above.....Even Staffers have opinions, and as long as those opinions do not prevent those Staffers from acting as Staffers without prejudice, then other Staff will not get involved. And that the rules are the same for everyone....if you don't like what someone is saying to or about you, BLOCK THEM. If you want their IP address so you can make sure that they can't get to you from ANY diary, THEN they can involve Staff. But other than that, unless a Staffer is taking advantage of their position and not being non-partial in Staff duties, then a Staffer will not be demoted, destaffed, or deleted.

There is nothing you can do NOW to make amends for what has been said. The only thing you can do is say you are sorry, but it's up to them if they believe you or not, or if they accept that apology or not. And from this point, to avoid the problem, if you can't think of a nice or tactful way to say something, maybe think about just NOT SAYING IT. Or if you really feel it needs to be said regardless of the untactfulness of it, then say it, and if they respond to it, and it's obvious the only thing that will happen is it will get worse, then don't respond back. Just delete it and ignore it. Forget they ever responded. And if they continue to harass YOU, then just block THEM.

But people do need to realize that Staff are Bloop diarists, too, and just because they are in a Staff position doesn't mean they have to keep their mouths shut and not voice their opinions. And if problems with a Staffer come up that are not related to STAFFING, then people need to just do what they would do to any other Blooper who said something stupid...BLOCK THEM. I know even some of my faves may not be happy with my statement of such, but it's the truth, plain and simple.

Agreed!

I AGREE WITH THIS, YO. I'M QUITE FOND OF STEVE (DESPITE THE FACT THAT WE WERE ONCE EACH OTHER'S TOTAL HATERZ! ;D) BUT I DO THINK IT BOTHERS HIM TOO MUCH WHAT PEOPLE THINK OF HIS STAFF, AND HE DOESN'T ALWAYS SEE THAT THERE ARE SOME PEOPLE WHO JUST LIKE TO PLAY VICTIM AND RESENT PEOPLE WHO HAVE A PERSONALITY/OPINIONS/POSITION/SENSE OF HUMOUR THAT THEY DON'T LIKE. THIS ISN'T SCHOOL. STAFF AREN'T THERE TO BE ROLE MODELS. THEY'RE THERE TO HELP WITH THE PRACTICAL RUNNING OF THE SITE - TO EXPLAIN HOW THINGS WORK AND SORT OUT GLITCHES.