So... I love my parents.
I know they mean well... and this is suprising but my mom is better about this particualr issue than my dad is.
But I'm Elora's Mommy. I should be hte one to deal with her when she's crying and fussing for no apparent reason (doesn't need changed or fed).
Most of the time my mom will wait for me to need help, a nap, something to eat... whatever. She'll let me come in and ask them to watch her for a bit.
And she's admitted that it's really hard not to just jump in and take over.
My dad?
He's a jumper lol
A big one.
He waits about ten minutes and comes in and takes her.
Without asking me if I need help.
I'm struggling with a way to tell him that I appreciate the help, but that I need to figure things out on my own.
I know I just said that perfectly but typing it out and telling my dad that without hurting his feelings are two different things.
The really frustrating thing is that when he's tired, or wants a cigarette (he's trying to quit and has cut back a lot) he acts like it's a huge chore to hold her for half an hour or so.
He's where I get the sensitive thing from I think.
He acts kind of gruff but he's a sweet guy with a really good heart.
He's also a complete marshmallow when it comes to Elora, so when she cries he wants to swoop in and fix it right away.
Example
Elora has begun to wake up and fuss when she's laid down in her crib/bassinet/playpen to sleep.
She's gotten used to being snuggled when she's asleep because we usually have her laying on us (me on the couch, or my mom/dad in the bed) when she falls asleep and it's really hard to get up and put her somewhere else.
I know I should, but I don't want to put her down. I always end up looking at her to make sure she's okay.
I've almost gotten past the feeling that I need to touch her briefly to make sure she's real... okay not really but I'm trying lol.
I know I can't be here all the time to snuggle and hold her.
I have to go back to work in roughly two weeks.
This does not bode well for either or our sleep schedules.
I was trying to get her to bed last night and she was fussing.
My dad came in and took her because he said I seemed upset.
But he never brought her back in.
He let her sleep with him in the bed. This is not good.
I love that he loves and wants to take care of her... but I'm her mother.
I know he's been through this with my brothers and I but he needs to let me learn and take care of her on my own.
I have a tentative plan to get her used to sleeping on her own.
But it's going to be tough getting him to go along with it.
My mom and I already talked about it today when she came home from work.
So maybe Grandma can get him to go along with the plan.
I've got one of those Bobby pillow things... I use it for nursing. It's great in the middle of the night when I'm tired and don't have the energy to hold my arm up.
That sounds pathetic but if you've ever been woken up by a hungry baby you know what I mean... especially if your baby eats like Elora lol
The boppy pillow saved my sanity today...
She refused to go down for a nap and I was so hungry I couldn't think straight (Thanks breastfeeding ). And wouldn't you know my dad (who's an unemployed bar tender) has a screwy sleep schedule and is out cold until about 1pm?
So I would have had to fire a gun next to his head to wake him up.
I set her down in the pillow just to shift things so I could at least grab a granola bar out of the diaper bag, cause I have a snack with me all the time.
And she stayed asleep.
It worked when I had her in the playpen too.
So hopefully I can get her to sleep in that tonight and gradualy switch her back over to sleeping by herself.
Hey, whatever works right!! Elora is adorable in her pillow, glad she finally stayed asleep there for you. I can imagine how hard it is to put her down once she's asleep...ahh. I'm due in 16 weeks and I already think about it, lol.
Hmmm yeah I had this problem with mum but I didn't live with her so it was easier to combat it. I have always been firm with Lexi self-settling to the point where people think I'm cruel
Looks like Elora likes to be elevated a bit. She looks so comfy in the pillow! I am hoping it works!
my daughter is 5 months and sleeps in her crib on her boppy.. She likes to be elevated and it helps with her spitting up .. best 20 bucks I ever spent..lol