ohai

05/30/2013

Yep. I still exist.
I've been incredibly lazy and kind of a jerk really. Pretty much ignored half of my life and slept while I wasn't looking for a job. I still don't have one as of right now but I've been kicking my own butt out of a serious slump, and I'm forcing myself to be hopeful. I have to find a job. I will. I can't take anymore of not being able to provide my daughter the life she deserves.
I wasn't kept on after season ended at Target or at Kohl's. That was in January. It really sucks. I know my life could be much worse right now but sometimes I just get overwhelmed. Can't breath... freak out... bake something... still can't breath.
I wish I was just... you know... whelmed. And employable. That would be nice.

That does not sound like I've been trying to get out of my slump. But I really have. I'm forcing myself to get out of bed earlier, actually making breakfast for Elora instead of shoving a bowl of cereal in front of her and falling asleep on the couch. I will not turn into my dad. I won't. I can't do that to her.

Cheerful, aren't I? :/

Elora is amazing by the way. She's insaley smart for her age, and very good most of the time. She's quite capable of throwing a huge tantrum if she feels the need however. My girl is what the child psychologists would call "sensitive". She notices if things have changed position in my Gram's little nicknack cupboard and wants to put them back "like before". She seems to be startled and upset by a large crowd, hates tons of noise, and is super sympathetic if some one is hurt or upset. When Can't imagine where she gets that from. Recently I've been trying different methods of curbing the tantrums, to varying degrees of success. Today when my dad slammed the door she straight up looked at him, shook her head and said "PapPap, no slamming door! Not nice! You need'a use words!" I couldn't stop laughing.


I'm going to upload some pictures and try and sleep. I promise I'll update soon. It'll be a good place to ramble and rant. I need that.

The pictures are from two recent trips to the zoo. The other baby is her boyfriend. Seriously. She calls Noah her boyfriend now.
The pictures of her and the giraffe are from Facebook Fan Night at the Pittsburgh Zoo. It was kind of awesome. The only bad part really was all the rain... adn the thunder scaring the new baby tiger inside so we didn't get to see him. We did, however, get to see and pet Lewis the giraffe. He was super sweet and kind of an attention hog. I wish I could have gotten a picture of him kissing my kid. Cause he did that. She's still talking a week later. Apparently Lewis made quite the impression.