Zero.
That’s what I accidentally named my squirrel.
Accidentally, because I was refusing to name the stupid thing since it isn’t real.
I’ve got a strange way of thinking things through.
And it makes it seem like I have a short attention span.
I’ve often said that I don’t really have a train of thought…
It’s more like a squirrel on a pogo stick.
My brain will attach itself to a word and pull a reference out of left field with it.
Like a whacked out game of word association.
Only no one else gets the associations.
Or at least not right away.
Example:
Pete asked me when in November Krista’s wedding was.
It reminded me that I had to talk to her about the bridesmaid dresses because she sent out an email giving some examples and wanted to see what we thought.
She also reiterated her promise of “No Bow on the Butt”
This is a fabulous rule by the way… unless your bridesmaids have no asses.
Then by all means, Bow Butt them.
Thinking about the fact that I had to wear a dress and look like a girl made me think …
“Girly… shit I have to look like a girl. Girls wear pink… pink… pink…
There was something I needed to remember about pink.
What was it?
Something about pink and it being a threat.”
Then I remembered.
About two weeks before Christmas I had sent Pete a text asking him what he wanted for Christmas.
He never answered.
Well that was a little annoying.
So I told him that if he didn’t tell me something that he wanted, whatever I picked would be pink and glittery.
And it was.
When I went out with The Brenden and Ashleyness in the week following Christmas, we went to Borders.
And there was a pen in the bins at the registers.
It was pink, had feathery fluff at the end, which was topped by a pink present with a red bow.
The present was glittery.
Too perfect.
Yes I bought it for him.
And I took it with me Friday evening to give to him.
But I forgot I put it in my bag.
Until I remembered that I had to look like a girl.
“Girls wear pink…. I kind of like pink. Pink and sparkly…. What was it about sparkly?
Pete’s present is pink! It’s in my bag!”
And I jumped up from watching a movie to get it for him.
Then explained how I remembered it was there.
He now has a pretty pen.
And I named my squirrel because I said there was no chance that I would.
“None! Zilch! No chance what so ever!”
And then the word Zilch got stuck… and Zero got named.
So that’s the story of Zero. |
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