joshua and i have been wanting out of toronto for a while now. i've been applying to jobs as they come up, and trying to swallow my disappointment when i don't get so much as an interview. it's disheartening.
lately, our desire to leave has become an urgency. i want out. he REALLY wants out. his desire to move strikes me as even more important than my own. i owe it to him. he took the plunge, made this huge move here with me 3 years ago, with the intention of this being a stepping stone to the next place. it's time to step. we've hit our limit and it's time to move on.
so, new game plan. joshua is going to try looking for work in any of a couple of places we've narrowed down (and are still narrowing down). if he becomes our primary breadwinner, working full time, i'd be able to take on a casual or part-time x-ray position, instead of hoping against hope that the universe will provide a full-time option (which is incredibly rare, hence my difficulty finding one thus far).
now, whereas i have a career based on post-secondary education, my husband does not. i wish things were different in that regard, but at least for now, it is what it is. he's a terrific salesman tho, and perfectly happy to push papers in an office, so we're hoping he finds something in that vein. josh being our main source of income will mean some sacrifice on both our parts, but we're both willing to cut back for the greater good. bye bye cable. so long home phone. see you later takeout and restaurants as anything more than a treat.
i'm working on a budget right now, listing our costs, both actual (fixed, like car payment) and estimated (flexible, like average rent), examining what sort of money he'll actually have to bring home to make us a single-income family. i'll take on a job too, even if it's outside of x-ray, but we need to have one stable, full-time job to count on before we consider moving. i/we have some savings that i'd rather not touch; the thought of dipping into them terrifies me. when you grow up poor, then bust your ass to save some, seeing that bank account dip is really scary. now, i have friends who are living paycheque to paycheque (or credit card to credit card) and i acknowledge that i've got some serious first world problems, worrying that my bank balance will drop below five figures. curse me all you want for that, but i worked hard to get where i am, and going from a stable, well-paying, full-time job, to the nothing and the unknown scares the shit out of me. but i'm ready to take the leap. we'll land on our feet, and hopefully sooner than later we'll be back on track, and heading toward buying our first house and making babies and all that fun future stuff. |