 sometimes things never change Well once again I've hit the wall that always knocks me down.
When I was living with my aunt before, I shared a room with my cousin. She liked me living there at times but most of the time she absolutely hated it. She hated me. Even when I was getting ready to ship out, the fights were there. It was always over stupid things too, never anything that there should be a fight about:
-me hanging out with her boyfriend (who is my friend and was before they got together)
-me taking bottles back because I needed to buy something
-me hanging out with my boyfriend in the basement, instead of her going down there
-me even living here
This time, I wasn't supposed to live here as long as I have. But I don't really have another option at this point. I moved in this time because I injured my lower back and my right knee and where I was living I had to go up a flight of stairs to get into the house and another really steep set to get to the room I was staying in with one of my friends. So my aunt was nice enough to let me stay here for awhile. However, it has been taking longer than I thought for everything to heal. So I've still been living here. My friend said I could always move back in, but the only problem with that is now I have a job and living there I would have no way to and from work. Living with my aunt, I can either get a ride from family, my boyfriend, or take a bus (once I have money). I feel bad for living here for so long like I have, but my aunt understands what I'm going through.
I was even so desperate for some place else to live that I called my mom and asked to move back in. Yeah...I'm that desperate.
Well today the argument started because my aunt said I could take the bottles back. We rotate weeks on the bottles because there are 4 of us here. Last week was my other cousins turn, he didn't want them so he gave them to his mom who gave them to my other cousin. She wants them this week when I need the money to buy some things for myself. But being the bigger person I told her she could have them. She had a hissy-fit and made another comment about how I'm not even supposed to be living here.
Everytime she makes comments like that it makes me feel like a 20-year-old orphan. I don't have any other place to go and if I leave, I'm going to be put on the streets again. I shouldn't feel like this and I shouldn't let her make me feel like this, but I can't help it. My mom did the same thing to me when I lived with her.
I just can't deal with this much longer. I have a feeling that soon I'm just going to leave and live off the streets again. I hate to say it but I really can't deal with all this stress anymore.
::end of story::
|
Loading...