I wish I could say I was staying on track but I've been binging almost nonstop for two weeks. It is really scary. I've learned that I can't have anything in moderation for very long. If I get cookies, maybe I can go three days with just having one but one the fourth day, I eat what is left. What I have learned from this is I can't have junk food in the house. The problem is however, I live with other people who enjoy that kind of food and are able to eat it without gaining. I feel really guilty and ashamed when I give in to the impulse to binge and eat their stuff. It makes me feel more out of control and like I can't stop going. I weigh 143 or 144 pounds. I don't like how I look so I'm depressed and sadly being depressed also is fueling this behavior. I want it to end. Everyday, I wake up with good intentions but at some point during the day, I give in to the urge to binge. Anyway, fighting this is really hard. |
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