Sometimes you shouldnt listen to people who are close to you even though you value their opinions more than everyone else.
I'm not sure which poem it was, but I sent one to my best friend. When we were out for dinner the other night, he totally trashed it while laughing. He said that "your grammar is horible in it." and "you are not suppose to rhyme every line that's just stupid." I told him that with poetry, there are no rules. (laughing he said) "where did you hear that from?" I told him from a professor in college. Which isn't true but I wanted it to sound good. He continued to laugh and said "I dont think so." I dont know spacificly what he was refering to, but I have my own "style" which consist of no periods. The end of the line is the end of the thought. (unless the line is not long enough) It's part of the creativity and free expression which writing poetry allows me.
So of course, coming from my best friend, I felt really down about my poetry. I know that I have got a lot of good feedback on here and from others but then I wonder, are people just trying to be nice? I don't know the answer to that. I have thought of publishing some of my poetry but if John is right, and my poetry does suck. I dont want to hear that from a publisher. So I do not know.
I wonder if people say my poetry is good just to be nice.
33. WILD SIDE
01-26-05
Jonathan
(real people from my life)
Dianne was a freshman college student who had it all
Smart, beautiful, great family and a boyfriend who was tall
One day she was with her boyfriend
She did something, she would never get to do again
Shooting up once, that is all it took
The boyfriend knowing, could not look
As she lay there dead, on the ground
An accident, that is what the police found
So this is what it is like, shooting up On the wild side
Jared came from a rich family
Never had to ask twice, it was always “me”
an only child, do you see?
His father never wanted any kids, Jared was told he was a mistake
Growing up, his father told him that he was a waist
Turned to drugs to numb his pain
Maybe it was the friendship, it ended up leaving him drain
Everyone went off to college
Jared was left, hanging off the edge
Older guys made him feel as he belong
So he went along
Went along for a ride
Stole a car, from a 70 year old man, and then he died
Leading a police chase, the car flipped.
Internal organs were left in bits
My friend Jared, died at 22
R.I.P I love you
But ya, you chose to walk, on the wild side
Bobbie took up boxing to defend himself
Ended up holding a few junior championship belts
One Saturday night, he was the star
He knocked his opponent really far
The count was ten, Bobbie had won again
“now I lay me down to sleep,
I pray the lord, my soul to keep.
And if I die, before I wake”
In the training room he went to go rest
He never woke, his brain was a mess
He chose to box, on the wild side
Jeff was a cool kid
Had a few friends, had a few sibs
Just your ordinary 16 year old
Did as he was told
17th birthday came around
Walking home from school, a new car is what he found
Took it for a spin
His buddy rings
Ends up racing on the street
Lost control of the car, a stone wall he meets
On impact he dies
He chose to drive, on the wild side
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