I can't seem to shake my sadness today. I want to cry myself to sleep. I want to hide under my blanket with headphones on and just let it all out. I miss my sister. Just thinking about Kedzie makes me want to cry. Trying to figure out if it's all worth it. But then I think, if I have to ask then it's not, because if it was worth it then I wouldn't have to ask. I miss Jill. I wish she was here. It was so natural to hug her and cry on her shoulder. I miss how she used to make everything okay. I hate that I've fucked up our friendship. I lost my best friend because I was stupid. .. -sigh-