Dear Diary... Im finally a mommy!! Xavier Jaden Rivera was born on October 19th. And what a experience it was. So he was actually exatcly 2 weeks late. The doctor planned my induction for that Thursday but I didnt make it lol. Whidh is a good thing cuz I rather have had natural labor instead of getting induced. So I was in labor for 13 and half hours. I had the epidural but for some reason it didnt work on me after a couple of hours. So when it was time to push I sure felt it lol. I thought I was never gonna make it. But I had my mom and Gaby there to support me. They had to use a vaccuum help me get him out cuz his heart rate kept going down. I actually got a little mad cuz I told Gaby I dont want no one in the room & his dad & stepmom came while I was still in labor. It was such a personal thing for me & I felt like they were invading my privacy. But my baby is soo gorgeous!! And he is such a good baby. But after I gave birth I had a lot of complications. I was in the hospital for 6 days cuz I kept getting a fever & no one knew why. I did like 6 tests and everything looked fine besides my gallbladder. It was inflammed. And they had to give me an antibotic for it & I couldnt breastfeed. So because of that he wont go to breast anymore. Now I have to pump. It was so stressful cuz I had a newborn & I was so sick I couldnt take care of him much. I broke down in tears a couple of times. But finally I went home with my baby. Gaby was a really good dad while I was sick but now it seems all he does is change his diaper. He doesnt like feeding him & doesnt like it when he cries so he just passes him to me. But as a new mother I can get overwhelmed too. Especially since Im the one who puts him to sleep during the night Im extra tired & I wish he could help me out more. And Im so depressed cuz I dont even fit into my biggest pair of jeans. So I have just been wearing sweats which I dont really own. My mom bought me a few pairs yesterday cuz I have nothing to wear. Hopefully I lose my weight fast. Well I feel tired right now so Im gonna try to take a quick nap while the baby is sleeping lol.
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