Day four in the small Ramsey house. One of the housemates is in her room (with the last can of flat, nasty strongbow cos shes too poor to afford new beer and what does it matter its alcohol)
The evening has gone downhill ever since i hung up to jimmy. I met my 'friend' alex on the stairs and she said she was going out to sarahs house (a nice friend i met on saturday) so i was like cool ill come. And we were walking along the wall, and i suddenly thought - what about alice- she has only one friend which is me, she might want to come to meet all these nice people at sarahs house. So I said to alex - meet me outside the SU in 15 minutes, and i legged it to the library where i knew alice must be. She hadnt been home and i was kinda worried about her. But i looked thorugh the whole place and there was no sign of her.
Then I went to meet alex outside the SU, and what a surprise nobody showed. I waited in the cold and dark for 15 minutes. Then i called it quits and came home. to find that alice still wasnt in. I got really worried about her, thinking shed got lost or been raped or something dreadful had happened.
Only found out she'd ditched me and fucked off.
I thought she was my friend. I feel so used and angry,
1. because i was worried about her not being here, i thought shes been raped or something,
2. i thought i was her only friend. shes MY only friend
3. i lost all my friends trying to find her and take her out with us - she just pissed off with her mate without a second thought.
4. we were sposed to go out tonight together
THIS is what you get for being a nice person. Its not happening again. All I want is some damn vodka and some quiet,.
This whole time ive been here ive had to wear stupid cuffs over my wrists. I figured it would be hard to make friends if people could see all that. I know if amelia saw id never hear the last of it, or rather, id never hear any of it personally. because as ive learnt people much rather talk about that shit behind your back,
but ive had enough of hiding. Im not making any friends as it is, why not let em have it. Why not throw in a few fresh ones for good luck. Im in the mood tonight |
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