So I said I wouldn't waste a day these holidays and I dont think I really have. Should have gone out skating some more, I feel like ive neglected my skates.
The diet has utterly, completely and totally failed. I havent lost any weight, I don't see myself any differently and I still completely desest my body and looks. My self confidence has possibly dropped a couple of notches too. Well great.
If I wasn't saving the alcohol for later I'd start downing it now. Trying to skip some meals here like Jimmy and Dianne do. They're both skinny as hell, therefore it must surely work.
Discovered I had more money in my kiddy account than I thought I had, and finally got rid of that account and put all my eggs in one basket (im rich im rich)
Im nervous about spending it though. I guess this all goes back to the liking to horde things. Like my no good father, who's birthday it is today. Well if thats not an excuse to get totally wasted then I dont know what is.
And I missed the bus, which is stupid of me. How often have I tried to catch that fucking thing? Now I have to wait another hour and a half before I can meet Jimmy. Even if he's in a bad mood I still want to attempt to cheer him up. Though I have no idea whats up with him. Probably something to do with shitty work, worries or me and my honesty yeserday. Despite what they say about being open, I think it really does hurt. |
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