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Miss.Krystle's Diary
by Miss.Krystle

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HELP!! Potty training advice needed.

04/15/2011


I have a big problem...but where to start?
In order to explain this problem, I have to talk about something that I know a lot of people are judgemental about. Please don't judge me. 
When Trystan was a year and a half, he was placed in foster care. Long story short, I wasn't quite ready to take on the responsibility of taking care of a child and being a single mother. I was young. And at the time, I didn't really have a stable home environment for him. I lived in a one bedroom apartment with Trystan's aunt and uncle, as well as 4 other people. So that's like, 7 people in one apartment. Needless to say, my decisions resulted in The Children's Aid society taking him out of my care. So his being placed in foster care was not because I was abusing him, or doing drugs, or anything like that. I love my son and would do anything for him if I could.
Anyway, when he was 2, he was put in daycare by the foster mother he was living with. At 2 and a half, the foster mother was told by the daycare that Trystan wasn't ready to be potty trained. So she didn't pursue it. 
Just after Trystan's 3rd birthday, he was placed back in my care. And he still wasn't potty trained. I have been trying since before Christmas to get him trained and ready for school. He will be 4 in June, and he STILL isn't trained! He knows the toilet is for going potty, and he will go if I put him on it. But if I don't sit him on the toilet every 20 minutes, he goes in his pullups/underwear. He also knows to tell me when he has to go. But he just won't do it! 
I don't know what to do. I've tried everything I can think of to get him to tell me he has to go potty. I even bring him into the bathroom with me when I go and I make him go once I'm done. 
I'm worried he won't be ready by the time he starts school in September. And most schools won't take a child if they aren't potty trained.
Does anyone have any advice or suggestions? I'm at my wits end, and it's getting really expensive buying a pack of pullups every week, since he goes through a pack a week. And a pack has 40 pullups in them. 
ARGH!! Help!!



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It's not as big a problem as you think it is. Really. I promise you he'll be potty trained before he goes off to college. Maybe you should just stop. Then once all of the pressure is gone he may just decide to do it on his own.

That said, I don't know your daycare center's policy on potty training. I worked in a preschool/daycare center (same thing) but I don't remember what our policy was. I'd check on that first, so that way you'll know if you have anything to worry about.

If he absolutely does have to be out of diapers before going to this daycare center, then just have him go around naked while he's home with you. With no pressure at all, teach him to clean up his own messes. He'll soon see it's much easier to just go on the toilet than to deal with cleaning up the results of not doing it. Obviously, since he's four, you're going to be with him all the time, so it'll be easy to catch him right away. Also, because of his age, you'll be there with him, gently teaching him how to clean up his messes, as you would while teaching him anything else.

Good luck. And don't let this stress you out. You're doing fine.

[ Avonlea@ITW|0 likes] [|reply]

Do you have a bag of 'poo candy'? Like a bag of nice Haribo candy, and you give him one whenever he poos in the toilet, but if he poos in his pants he doesn't get one. You call them 'poo candy' because he will only get one when he poos in the toilet! My sis and all her mummy friends used this method.

[Bubblegum BimberlyStar|0 likes] [|reply]

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