Stress.
We all suffer from it at one point or another in our lives, right? Some of us though, suffer from stress on a 24/7 basis.
I, would be one of those people.
I am ALWAYS stressed out about things. Maybe it's my curse. That's what I'm convinced of.
If it doesn't have to do with Trystan, it's something else. Family, friends, stupid drama, personal problems. You name it, I have to deal with it.
Ever since I was a kid, I have been continuously put in stressful situations. And just when I think that the storm is over, another wave comes in and swoops me up.
I just can't escape.
I found out this past weekend that Doug may be doing jail time for this crime he didn't even commit. His ex is a psycho whore, and even had ME charged when she was dating Doug, claiming that I was "harrassing" her, and that she was fearful for her life.
Give me a break lady. I'm harmless, and couldn't hurt a fly.
So anyway, long story short, this dumb bitch accused Doug of rape, and of course, I know he isn't capable of doing something so heinous...I've known him since I was 17. That's 9 years...so I think I would know what I'm talking about, right? Well, he was told by his lawyer that the only way he will walk away from these charges is if the bitch doesn't show up at his trial. Fortunately though, I was able to contact my criminal lawyer and have him take Doug on as a client. Because I knew Doug's lawyer was giving him the run around, and not doing his job properly.
I'm keeping my fingers crossed my lawyer pulls through and can come up with some way to prove Doug's innocence.
Aside from that, I have to deal with Trystan's behaviour on a daily basis. Which, in itself, is extremely stressful. The kid just DOESN'T listen! No matter what I tell him, he ignores me. It's almost like he doesn't care what I say. And I'm his mother. As long as other people are around, he will listen to them, and even me on occasion. But the second it's just me and him, he turns into a complete terror. He throws things, he hits me for no reason, he is CONSTANTLY doing everything he knows he isn't allowed to do. I know he's only going on 4, but he is extremely smart and he DOES know better.
Of course, those aren't the only things stressing me out. The list really does go on...I could be here forever if I decided to explain everything.
But I've noticed the last few days, I've been feeling rather...blah. I've had this headache that keeps coming and going since Sunday...my stomach has been upset - so much so that I hardly have an appetite - I also had indigestion for a couple of days, which was totally gross and horrible. Again, the list goes on.
So I was looking up signs and symptoms of severe stress. Apparently, stress can affect a person more than just physically. Which now, I understand a little bit more why certain things have been occuring with my psychological and social being as well.
I've copied and pasted the lists I found, and highlighted in red the symptoms I have been suffering from. Based on that, I'm very surprised I haven't ended up in the hospital as a result of the stress.
Signs and symptoms include:
Physical:
Breathlessness
Churning stomach
Diarrhoea/Constipation
Dizziness
Dry mouth
Excess perspiration
Fatigue
Headaches
Hyperventilating
Increased colds/flu
Increased heart rate
Indigestion
Impotence
Nausea
Palpitations
Pre Menstrual Syndrome
Sense of heart pounding
Shallow breathing
Sleeping problems
Tension headaches
Tingling in hands/legs
Tremor in hands/legs
Weight loss/gain
Psychological:
Abrasive
Anxious
Blaming others
Catastrophising
Cynical
Depression
Depressed/Anxious thinking
Excess guilt
Excess worries over health
Feeling a failure
Feelings of fear
Feeling unable to cope
Frustration
Hopelessness/helplessness
Hostile
Hypercritical of self/others
Impatience
Increased worrying
Indecision
Irritability
Jealousy
Lack of concentration
Loss of confidence
Lower self-esteem
Mind in a whirl
Mood swings
Negative thinking
Pessimistic thinking
Rumination
Sensitivity to criticism
Snappy
Stressful thinking
Tense
Worrying a lot
Behavioural:
Aggression
Agitation
Avoidance behaviour
Crying
Decreased/increased sexuality
Difficulty relaxing
Difficulty with relationships
Eating fast
Eating too much/too little
Gambling
Hostile behaviour
Impatience
Increased alcohol
Increased caffeine
Increased smoking
Losing temper
Making mistakes
Nail biting
Outbursts of anger
Poor eye contact
Poorer personal hygiene (I realize this is gross, but unfortunately, it's true. I still shower and such, but it's become more of a chore than anything.)
Poor time management
Restlessness
Risk taking
Substance abuse
Talking fast
Walking fast
Withdrawal from relationships
Withdrawal from activities
So, the truth here? I think I am pretty sick...in the sense that I need to get some kind of help with dealing with my stress. Because I am seriously worried that one day, it will get to the point where I give up all together. And I don't want to get to that point, because I have my boy to worry about.
And on that note, I took a picture of me and Trystan this morning and edited it a little bit. I think it's quite nice.
Anyway, that's all for now. I'll update again soon.
Ciao!
Krystle Melissa | Create Your Badge
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