The other night I was drinking and I don't drink much at all really. my wife and I have been having problems because of stupid things I've done and I had been thinking a lot about those things and I have come to a realization that I am pretty damn selfish and she doesn't deserve to be neglected because of my selfishness.
Well from what my wife has told me I broke completely down and spoke from the heart, I said things that I could've never told anyone sober (like that's a real good way to express my inner feelings....).
So I've decide I need to trust her completely with our relationship and my feelings go, go without a doubt that she loves me and that I need to do everything in my power to make her as happy as I can no matter how much it may break me down, hurt me or make me upset.
She trust me and I must do the same for her, it's only fair that I treat her as well as she has treated me.
I've done nothing but be selfish,cruel, and emotionless. She deserves so much more and I have to give that to her no matter the cost. I haven't been a good husband and that is going to change, I finally got the balls up to seek professional help and get my priorities in line, with my marriage being at the top of the list. The point of this is that I don't really remember everything that I said to her that night but I do know that is was what I've needed to get out for a very long time. Wow I am so scattered with the way I've wrote this.....
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