The obstacles of having a never tending father.

12/15/2009

The relationship between father and son should be in a best friend kind of mode. They should always fish together, have your first beer with him, and always talk to him about things. I wish I had that kind of father. Of course my father didn't care about me since birth. I've always been the mama's boy that mother had always dreamed about. I wish that my father didn't get into hardcore drugs when i was little. Maybe my life would be different. I probably wouldn't be as screwed up as i am now. Failing my classes, being social awkward, and thinking that my life is just about working and nothing but working. I think I am becoming my mother. I don't want to become my mother. I want to live well in the future, have my dream life, and be able to travel around the world. Sometimes my father tries to blame my mother for the wrongs that he commited. I know my mother is trying her best, but when you have two kids and are always out not tending to them everyday, they might as well become independent and have to deal with things without knowing how to. My father of course tries to act like he cares about me. But of course it doesn't work on me. Cooking me dinner, and giving me stuff isn't going to convince me that you care about me. There is always the tending loving moments that you have to have with your son. Talking to him about girls or maybe even guys if your son like guys. There is nothing wrong with that. Taking your son to his first party, acting strict around him, and maybe even grounding him a few times lets me know that my father cares about me. All my father cares about is where is his drink of alcohol is coming from, or when someone will give up 20 or 50 bucks for his "gas money". I'm not stupid, all that man cares about is himself, and where his pleasured items are. Whatever like you need a father says everyone. Well to me missing a parent means that you are a broken child. You won't have the experiences that you would if you had a full family. I feel for single parents and how hard it is to raise your children. But to be able to raise your children you need at least two parents. But my father was never there for me. He would show up for those rare occasions if someone was handing out free booze or food. All i am trying to point out this morning is that every child needs a father. Even if you say oh well i made it through life without one! Because i know that deep down inside that brain or heart, which ever your feelings are, you always want to have that dream family. You always wanted that true experience in your teenage life, having the obstacles of stricts parents, and to feel what a real teenage life was. If you read this at the end and feel sorry for me don't. I am just writing this to get some things off my chest. Have a great morning and maybe ill write some more if people like this.
Thanks,
Reyes