Ok so there is another entry before this one so read it plz lol...
Today I had my therapy appointment. My car was still acting up so first thing this morning I drove out to Mike's and he drove me to school. Then he waited at the school for me to get out since it was only an hour and he drove me to Marion. This is where I felt like I was slapped in the face. They pretty much told me I'm bi polar 2. Which really isn't so bad because the medicine my dr put me on the other day my therapist thinks she already suspected it but its up to him to make that diagnosis. So he wrote out his report and what not. But I'm ok....the meds I'm on right now are helping so much its almost like I'm a different person. But I admit I was a mess after the appointment...it happens in 3 stages...denial which i've been in for a long time...acceptance...which I'm trying to do right now....research and learn everything I can about it. Thats how I do things and thats what I'm going to with this. Mike had dropped me off at school but I pretty much lost it. I just couldn't handle it because for some reason I kept thinking I was going to lose him over this. I called him after he had just driven back to his place and asked him to come get me and he's so good to me, he came right back out and got me. Then he let me sleep in his bed while he did some more work on my car. On the way from my appointment I had said I didn't want to have sex at that moment because I would be doing it just to forget and I didn't want to do that to him. Well after he finished my car he curled up in bed with me but when I made a move on him he got upset. And I tried to explain I was ok, that this time I wanted sex because I was so happy to be with him and to realize he's going to be behind me no matter what. But it just turned out bad, so we just curled up and then my friend Jen called and her and I talked while he got to hear my side of the conversation. It was funny, usually is. So then we fell asleep, I rolled over a little after 6pm to tell him I needed to head home soon, my mom had Austin, she picked him up from daycare and kept him for a while for me. So then he made a move on me and I asked what he was doing and he said he thought about what I said and realized I was right and that I wasn't doing it cause I was upset, I was doing it because I wanted to be with him. We didn't use a condom but he pulled out and I have an IUD in. We don't have any condoms at his place, we need to get some. I'm hooked on him so much and I hope it works out. We have a lot to work on, but we work it out together. He's willing to be there when I need him, and I don't throw a fit over his 5 hour playstation 3 binges every night. I'm just happy to be happy. I can't remember a time I've ever felt so loved and understood him my life.
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