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That's as impossible as nailing jello to a tree <3
by Shar

previous entry: Zap

next entry: Do you have time for a quickie??

Update

07/11/2010



Omg I haven't been on in forever. I keep saying I'll get on and update but I just end up reading a few faves and then getting off. I've been so busy packing and getting ready to move. The new place should be ready by Tuesday...I'm so excited. I really hate living in an apartment and moving to this 3 bedroom trailer will give up so much more space. Plus Austin will have room outside to play. We can have a swing set and a small pool at the new place. I don't like him playing outside here because the kids are so mean. Of course there are no parents in sight. Why would you let your 5 year old just roam around an apartment complex doing whatever he wants? That's what some of the parents do. Just set the kids out and then stand outside yelling their names when its time to go in. So I've pretty much just kept Austin in sight and don't let him play with the rougher kids.

Cliff and I have been fighting lately because there is still a bunch of work to be done on the trailer before we can move in, but they said it should be ready by Wednesday. I want to wait until then to move anything because I don't want any of our stuff getting dirty or damaged while they are still working. But when he wants to do something it has to be his way, and I really get so mad cause its like anything I say doesn't matter. So I had to throw a fit today because they started taking things over to the trailer which is completely against everything I said, I mean come on 95% if this shit is mine. There are people in and out of the trailer and they don't lock it at night, why would I want to leave stuff there for other people to take???? Ugh Idk he's just starting to get on my nerves. That's one of those things. I like to do things my way especially when it comes to my stuff. I know it sounds stupid to get mad cause i know he was just trying to help, but doesn't what I say about my stuff matter at all???? Ugh it makes me so fucking pissed.

I'm also stressing out waiting for my period. We weren't as careful as we usually are and here I am totally fertile and late again. I'm hoping and praying that its stress. I can't afford a baby right now. I wouldn't have even thought it except I've been so run down and icky feeling lately, and my MOM mentioned that I was acting like I was pregnant. I rolled my eyes because we're almost always careful but we ran out of condoms and there were two nights we had sex and I just passed out and I remember he didn't pull out. Which I totally know isn't 100% effective but its better then burying it deep and shooting for a score right. So when I got home I was counting days just to see because I'm usually off a little bit, usually no more the a week at the most and here I am going on two weeks late. So I'm praying its stress from looking and finally finding a place and now having to move coupled with stress from work which has been crazy. So keep your fingers crossed. I know I could just go out and buy a test but I just put 850 down for rent and deposit on the trailor, 100 to turn on the water, 225 for the electric plus what I'm going to have to give already in pull ups and wipes for the kid I've already got. I can't even afford a 2 dollar test from the dollar store right now. Saying I'm broke is an understatement considering I owe my mom money, I'd have to say I've got negative no money lol. That's what I tell my friend's at work when they ask if I want to go out. Nope I'm totally in the neg man.

Other things going on, Frankie has gone totally weird on me. I can't really explain what's going on because I don't even understand it. We work together and this is a prime example why managers and employees shouldn't fraternize. We really got into it at work today, because he thinks since we're friends he can do what he wants but it doesn't work that way. He still has to do his job regardless of what he wants. That's what he gets paid for, and it doesn't matter how nice I am he still can be an ass. So I sent him home today, just totally lost my temper and went off. So he went out got drunk and got in trouble. So I'm pretty sure he got arrested and everyone is acting like its my fault. If I hadn't yelled at him he wouldnt' have gotten drunk. Bullshit, he's got a problem just like so many other guys I know and you know what, I didn't hold a gun to his head and make him act like an ass or go take that drink. Totally not my fault. Oh well I'm tired, I'm going to run a few errands and then crash. Nite all!!!

previous entry: Zap

next entry: Do you have time for a quickie??

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