Disclaimer.....ok this is an extremely mommy entry and if you are one of those people who can't stand reading about a person's child then hit the back button and step the fuck off my diary.
So I don't do this often. I don't write an entry entire entry about Austin. Usually he's part of my day and I put in his activities as I see fit. But I'm worried so I'm posting. I've thought something was off with him for a while. He's 2. He says maybe 5-10 words. Sometimes he says a word once and never says it again. He won't look me in the eye. He groups all his colors together, faces his cars all in the same direction, gets engrossed in one or two things and wants nothing to do with anything else. There's more but those are the major ones. The speaking thing has bothered me for a while. Also he hates being in a crowd, if Walmart is crowded he loses it. He doesn't mind making loud noises himself but he's very sensitive to noise around him. When he's at daycare he won't play with the other kids, when they do group activities he sits to the side and doesn't want to be involved, he just watches intently. He can stare out the window forever and be entertained. Its just weird sometimes. I'm with him all the time so I see these things. Ken kept telling me to stop imagining a problem where there wasn't one. A person I work with said to stop making up excuses for attention. Trust me, I don't want that kind of attention. So I shut my mouth. His daycare teacher said that he reminds her of her cousin who is mildly autistic. It was the first sign someone was seeing something as well. Well he started speech therapy and at the initial interview thing she said she didn't think he was autistic that he babbles so much and is so interactive that she didn't see it. Well that's changed. She's worked with him for a few months, watched him at daycare, worked with him one on one. And now she wants to send him to be tested for Autism. She's sending him for an official hearing test and recommending him for early intervention at the school to start when he's 3 so he'll be up to speed when he's 5. He has a lot of trouble with spoons and forks. He's no where near the level the kids in his daycare class are and he's older. He's the oldest in his class and they are talking about moving him up to the next class who are even more advanced then he is but they say they can't do anything that in the next couple months he'll be moved. He's not ready. I'm so worried about him at times. He can hear, there's no doubt about that. He does have signs of autism. I'm not jumping to conclusions and I'm trying not to worry too much until he's been tested. I just can't help feeling lost. Ken's no help, he's not going to be supportive in anything. I'm pretty much on my own on this one. ugh I could just scream because I feel like I have no where to turn. I talk to my mom but its hard because she just keeps saying that she knew something was wrong with him and crying and its just driving me nuts. I keep hoping that its just his hearing, but i know he can hear, i know thats not the problem. So i'm just sitting here waiting for something to happen. I want to cry.
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