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I am choosing to just Be...
by Simply Red

previous entry: "what'd you get for Christmas?".."A abortion..You?"..

next entry: Regressing for the New Year

"Mammograms, Abortions, Exboyfriends"..."how was YOUR Christmas?"..

12/28/2010

Hope everyone's Christmas went well. Mine went great minus the fact I was pukey and trying to hide it from my family. This year I got..
. Fuzzy socks
. PJs
. expensive chocolate
. a mini portable espresso maker
. Lots of cash

Other than that I've just been planning for the abortion and the New Year. The New Year is always a big deal for me. On the Jan 1st I do the Polar Plunge and party. I do it with my mom, step-mom, a close bunch of friends and my brother. So it's kind of a big family deal. Unfortunately with the abortion on Thursday i may not be able to jump this year, which is upsetting. So I've been looking up post abortion pain and recovery and other than I can't get a straight answer on the pain scale, I know there should be AT-LEAST mild cramping and also that pain is case to case based, but I was hoping for a better idea of how bad. The recovery seems like any other recovery process involving urethral or urinary, mild bleeding, and general list of "do nots". None of the less, I'm still extremely nervous.

On top of that a few other crappy things have come up. Right before Christmas my mom had a irregular mammogram and had to go for biopsy, so we we're waiting for those result which she will get this week. Then just today the most strange and random thing happened. I got a phone call this evening from a cellphone number I didn't recognize, me figuring it was a friend who got a new number or just wasn't saved in my phone (I have an extensive to the point of obnoxious amount of people I know) answered the call which is strange seeing how most unknown numbers I let go to voice mail. BIG MISTAKE! Before I explain I need to give you a little back-story. Me and my ex form high-school were together 4 years and were close friends for near 6 years but we fought constantly most of our relationship which is why I ended it. When we started dating my youngest brother was 3, He and my ex got extremely close. When me and my ex broke up we managed to stay good friends for a year (we still fought semi constantly). Well this past July my ex got a new girlfriend, to whom he introduced to my 8 year old brother on his birthday (July 4th) before I even had met her. I was furious, we quit talking for the most part and no longer hung out, but we were still on ok terms. NEVER ONCE DID HE TELL ME NEVER TO CONTACT HIM AGAIN OR THAT HE DIDN'T EVER WANT TO HANG OUT AGAIN. From July to now I've contacted him 7 times all but 3 being about stuff for my younger sibling. But back to the present and the mystery phone-call....It was his girlfriend whom I've never met or spoken to calling to tell me to never get a hold of him again, that if its about my younger brother my godmother can do it, and to quit inviting him to stuff, and that HE HAD ALREADY TOLD ME NEVER TO CONTACT HIM AGAIN. (Hm please refer to previous bold print..) My response was ok whatever but he never said anything of the kind or you wouldn't be making this phone-call because it wouldn't be an issue, I also to her to NEVER call my number again. I somehow managed to do this while holding my composure (real feat for me, I'm known for my temper)...Hung up with her called my mother and BLEW UP! My major issue with the situation is that he did not tell me himself, it could've been a text or a internet message of any form. Oh no he gave his girlfriend WHO I NEVER MET MY NUMBER AND LET HER CALL ME! So now its an issue, a very big issue. I didn't call him or anything like that, but good luck ever seeing my brother again. If you can't be cordial with me like hell I'm letting you around my 8 year old brother.

I have hair, nails, and waxing appointments tomorrow and i revamped my wardrobe today so hopefully come the new year I'll feel like my old "pin-up" self, or hell at-least moderately better.

previous entry: "what'd you get for Christmas?".."A abortion..You?"..

next entry: Regressing for the New Year

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