life stuff and stuff and a little bit of death lol

After NoJoMo, it felt weird about to end the day without a Bloop update.

Let's see. today I began my one-on-one class with one of my students. After just a week of being there, they let me have a one-on-one class. From 10-11, I'm going to be teaching math to Aiden, i want to say 7 year old boy possibly on the spectrum with extreme attention deficit disorder. The rest of the day, I'm still assisting the class with the other elementary school boys, Noah and R.J. who are both 6. R.J. is turning 7 in a couple weeks. They are awesome kids. And I say that with love. They both have behavioral issues. Anger, extreme emotional jumps. ADD. It's a fun day. I'm there 9 to 1:30 every day. It's only part time. Sucks for my bills, but it's work, and I get to teach kids again. I can't wait to see these kids grow up. I truly hope I'm there for a good amount of time.

I have been writing my novel in any free time I can get. I'm seriously determined to finish this thing. I don't care if it's crap. I will not stop, until it's done. It's funny, I just realized my main character says something similar like that throughout the entire book. lol. I wonder if that's my subconscious. lol I'm kind of nervous and excited to finally finish something. I still have to edit, and when I'm stuck on continuing, I go back and reread everything editing, adding more scenes etc. I can just imagine the plot holes I have to fix. lol! I started writing this thing about four years ago, and stopped. I'm not a linear writer. I will start something, work on the end, work on something in the middle, head back to the end, and write back towards the beginning again. I was reading an ending scene I originally wrote, and found a character's name I didn't recognize. I was like "who are you? I don't know you? did I have plans for you?"

Other than that, there's not too much to update on.

ohhh so last week, I had a horrible dream about a friend of mine, Rory. It was bad. I don't remember much of it right now, but I know he ended up dead and I woke up in a panic and really sad. In real life, I hadn't talken to him much lately. Rory's an interesting person. I still call him my little brother. We met in high school. We've been through a lot together. (a couple attempted relationships. but I sorta vomit a little when i think about it, so i'd rather not) He named me one of his daughter's godmothers. But he can be a complete jerk at times. Stops talking to you for no reason. Or he'll get paranoid that you're doing something purposely against him. He's on his 7th wife now. no lie. seven. He admires people like Sarah Palin and Donald Trump. He'll call anyone who disagrees with him a moron. But he's my little brother, and I love him. Because he's been there for me many times. And because someone has to love the butthead. I just don't talk to him very much any more.
A couple days later, I FB messaged him: "hey! So this is going to sound odd, but I had a pretty scary dream about you the other night. Without going into details, let's just say you ended up possibly dead. (I just saw you say wtf in your head. lol) And of course, I was freaking out and ended up waking up crying. I know we don't talk too much, but I just wanted to say that you're still my little brother, and I never considered us any less of friends. (I'm a hermit anyway when it comes to talking to most people.) I do lurk pics of the kiddoes all the time, and try to keep up on the goings on of your life. So please don't think that I'm silent for silly reasons, if you think I'm silent at all. I dunno. The dream kind of fucked with me. Don't worry. It's nothing prophetic. If I considered it prophetic, this would be an entirely different message lol. I've always been into dream symbols, and I know that if someone dies, it means that you feel like something in the friendship is gone. I don't want that to happen. You've been a close friend of mine for *counts* 16 years now? sixteen, right? I dunno. Over half my life. That's saying something. In my dream, I was also sad that I never got to say what an awesome friend you are. So this is me saying it. I couldn't ever imagine what you've been through during your active duty, and I know that it still affects you. You're in my prayers every day because of it. I wanted you to know that too. I try to tell all my friends how important they are to me all the time. I realized I haven't told you lately. So here I am. yayfun. So try not to be dream killed anymore, k? I can't do that again. lol /endoddfbmessage"

So I sat there thinking what the hell is going to think? lol What an odd message. 'so i had a dream you died.' How do you respond to something like that? lol But he messaged me back later in the day: "Aw Mel!!! I loves ya too!! I know we don't talk much anymore but I still keep up with your life too! We don't get down there much anymore bc it's such a haul with all the kids but next time we are down I think we're all gonna go out for dinner...you and Russ, Meghan and Mason, Lindsay, Denise and her hubs and son....and reconnect and sit and bullshit like the good ol days"

So now there's plans to together and have a hotel room party around the 20th. They're going to have a suit with a separate room for the kids to play, and we're just gonna get together and chat and play cards or something. I'm actually kind of excited. I haven't seen him in a few years, and I can't wait to see the kids. He just got married again to a girl with a daughter his own daughter's age. And they just had their own kid.

so yayfun!
-mel-