Update...
Happiness is something I'm still searching for. There are a few things in my life that make me happy, and I thank God every day for those things. But true happiness is something I still seem to be searching for.
So let's update.
Back in January or so I mentioned that I was going to begin IVF. Whoopie. I've struggled with the thought of this for a while. One one hand, I was excited to begin the process, on the other, it pissed me off that it had to come to this.
Well, there were many obstacles in the beginning of the year that prevented us from starting and we didn't get to begin until August. It was a scary procedure, to me anyway. The egg retrieval was nerve wracking because they have to put you to sleep, and I've never had that done before.
But I survived, had the embryo transfer and struggled through my 2 week wait.
At 1 1/2 weeks, I started bleeding, and that was the end. I still can't believe I've had a failed IVF. It's like what the hell?
Since the failure, I have not been myself. Which, I guess is to be expected. But I've been so down, it's just awful.
My birthday was on the 12, I turned 29. That isn't helping with my feelings. It's not that I'm getting older, or almost 30. It's just that I'm 29 and still struggling with this TTC issue. That issue and other things in my life.
So, the nurses at my clinic asked me when I'd like to try again. I'm gonna try again in November. And that's that.
This was a LONG entry, hope you stuck through.
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