I think its dead. The more I pull, the further you go. And then tonight we ended it. Part of me is relieved. But then there's reactive attachment disorder to factor in. So I wait. Will I regret it? Will I get lonely and write a long futile apology? Will we start over? Or just continue? I just can't be on the back burner anymore. I'm intelligent, funny, and completely gorgeous. So what am I not doing right? I want to settle down. Get a good job. And have a child. That's my goal for myself. But you've chosen to remove yourself. Or I removed you. But do you still factor in? I see a shadow in my head holding my child that I would have liked to be you. But you were too far. And inside, while my appearance is far from something to be ashamed of, I'm still that overweight kid I was in high school that starves for attention and can't be alone. The paths we choose are the paths we choose. But have I gone the wrong way this time? You make me starve for affection. And my ribs are showing. |
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