I can't take this anymore, I am so tired of acting like everything is going just hunky dory when it's simply not!! The truth is that we're about to lose absolutely everything we own...work is not saving us I make minimum wage, barely bring home $200 a week but the government tells me that I make to much money for financial aid. We are about $550 dollars behind on rent and our land lord is wanting $150 dollars for rent by tomorrow and there is NO way for me to come up with it!!! We're SCREWED, poor John can't find a job and I can't look for a new job because no one is going to hire a 7 month pregnant woman who will be going on maternity leave soon. In fact the only reason I got the job I did was because I hid the fact that I'm pregnant until after I'd already been hired. At the time I could do it because I wasn't really showing yet, but now if you can't look at me and tell then the strange jumping under my shirt when he kicks me in the ribs would give me away in a second!
We got in our power bill the other day it was $196 dollars, it also came with a letter stating that if we can't find a way to start paying our bill on time they are going to make us pay a deposit equal to a two month power bill! Oh yeah AND our phone bill came it...it's SUPPOSED to be $60 a month but somehow or another they found a way to charge us over $200 dollars!! Then of course you add in gas for the car, the car insurance, everyday expenses such as toilet paper, paper towels and juice for the baby (which WIC doesn't cover for Isabel) and you can begin to see how desolate our situation really is!
I want to pull us out of this, I would LOVE to be able to live without having to look to other people for help but how else are we supposed to survive? NO ONE will hire John, ABSOLUTELY NO ONE...he has a theft by taking on his record, no GED (no money to GET a GED) and to top it off it's almost Christmas, then New Years so no one's going to be hiring until after the first of the year anyway! All that on to boot with the fact that when I have the baby I won't be able to work for at LEAST 6 weeks right after which they plan on tying my tubes and I have no clue how long they'll want me to sit at home on that one! Work won't let me come back right after having a baby because I'd be considered a liability and of course there is no way for me to HIDE the fact that I had the baby!
Then of course theres the fact that NONE of my friends talk to me anymore and my family all look at me like I'm supposed to have the answers for everything! I have absolutely NO support from any side, like I said somehow or another I got posted as the one who's supposed to have the answers and I simply DON'T...oh man what the hell is the use? No one gives a shit about all this belly aching, no one can help me and bitching about it isn't going to make it any better! I'm outtie, caio and Blessed Be!
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