SO, I've recently discovered something lovely. For a few years now I have been having tremendous pain in my lower region and couldn't figure out why. Went to...I don't even remember how many doctors and took over a million different tests, until FINALLY, one came through. Intersticial Cystitis is a genetic disorder where the inner lining of you bladder stops producing itself and your urine starts to eat away at your bladder cells. This being because of all the acid in your urine, and what causes all the acid in your urine? The food you eat and drink. So now I am on a ridiculously strict diet where I basically eat misery and water. Its crazy the things I can't have. NO fruit except for watermelon, pears, and blueberries. Absolutely nothing with acid in it. NOTHING, nada, and a couple of other things like wheat bread and yogurt, which I don't understand. I know people have many diseases and disorders that are much worse, so I really shouldn't be complaining. Its just it makes me so stressed out all the time and now the medicine I'm on makes me so tired and weak feeling all the time. I'm getting bruises everywhere, I get night sweats, and if I do eat anything forbidden, I get such awful pains that it makes me not want to eat anymore. Aside from all that, I can't do anything, I can't get a job, I can't go to school. I want to contribute to my family or at least help out in some way but I'm just so tired all the time...just all the time and I can't help it. Anyways...the only reason I'm telling you this...whoever you are reading this...is to see if there's someone out there I can talk to. I feel so alone and no one understands what a bitch this can be. My family is supportive..well for the most part, my dad and step mom wont leave me alone about the job or school thing, but I need to talk to someone, anyone who gets what I'm talking about. I just feel so...pathetic for being sick. I know I can't help it, but it feels like it is my fault.. |