Here are my favorite quotes from my favorite movies.
WARNING WARNING
RACIAL SLERS, SEXUAL CONTEXT, SWEARS AND FUNNY LINES WILL BE FOUND
P.S. I am still working on two other entries. One about my 4th of July. The other is the rest of the poem about the boy and his guitar. It'll be a book lol
Fever Pitch
Troy: Why do we inflict this on ourselves?
Ben: Why? I'll tell you why, 'cause the Red Sox never let you down
Troy: Huh?
Ben: That's right. I mean - why? Because they haven't won a World Series in a century or so? So what? They're here. Every April, they're here. At 1:05 or at 7:05, there is a game. And if it gets rained out, guess what? They make it up to you. Does anyone else in your life do that? The Red Sox don't get divorced. This is a real family. This is the family that's here for you.
Lindsey: If you love me enough to sell your tickets, I love you enough not to let you.
Bull Durham
Annie Savoy:I believe in the Church of Baseball. I've tried all the major religions, and most of the minor ones. I've worshipped Buddha, Allah, Brahma, Vishnu, Siva, trees, mushrooms, and Isadora Duncan. I know things. For instance, there are 108 beads in a Catholic rosary and there are 108 stitches in a baseball. When I heard that, I gave Jesus a chance. But it just didn't work out between us. The Lord laid too much guilt on me. I prefer metaphysics to theology. You see, there's no guilt in baseball, and it's never boring... which makes it like sex. There's never been a ballplayer slept with me who didn't have the best year of his career. Making love is like hitting a baseball: you just gotta relax and concentrate. Besides, I'd never sleep with a player hitting under .250... not unless he had a lot of RBIs and was a great glove man up the middle. You see, there's a certain amount of life wisdom I give these boys. I can expand their minds. Sometimes when I've got a ballplayer alone, I'll just read Emily Dickinson or Walt Whitman to him, and the guys are so sweet, they always stay and listen. 'Course, a guy'll listen to anything if he thinks it's foreplay. I make them feel confident, and they make me feel safe, and pretty. 'Course, what I give them lasts a lifetime; what they give me lasts 142 games. Sometimes it seems like a bad trade. But bad trades are part of baseball - now who can forget Frank Robinson for Milt Pappas, for God's sake? It's a long season and you gotta trust. I've tried 'em all, I really have, and the only church that truly feeds the soul, day in, day out, is the Church of Baseball.
Field of Dreams
Terence Mann:Ray, people will come Ray. They'll come to Iowa for reasons they can't even fathom. They'll turn up your driveway not knowing for sure why they're doing it. They'll arrive at your door as innocent as children, longing for the past. Of course, we won't mind if you look around, you'll say. It's only $20 per person. They'll pass over the money without even thinking about it: for it is money they have and peace they lack. And they'll walk out to the bleachers; sit in shirtsleeves on a perfect afternoon. They'll find they have reserved seats somewhere along one of the baselines, where they sat when they were children and cheered their heroes. And they'll watch the game and it'll be as if they dipped themselves in magic waters. The memories will be so thick they'll have to brush them away from their faces. People will come Ray. The one constant through all the years, Ray, has been baseball. America has rolled by like an army of steamrollers. It has been erased like a blackboard, rebuilt and erased again. But baseball has marked the time. This field, this game: it's a part of our past, Ray. It reminds of us of all that once was good and it could be again. Oh... people will come Ray. People will most definitely come.
Good Will Hunting
Will: So, when did you know, like, that she was the one for you?
Sean: October 21st, 1975.
Will: Jesus Christ. You know the fuckin' date?
Sean: Oh yeah. 'Cause it was Game 6 of the World Series. Biggest game in Red Sox history.
Will: Yeah, sure.
Sean: My friends and I had, you know, slept out on the sidewalk all night to get tickets.
Will:You got tickets?
Sean: Yep. Day of the game. I was sittin' in a bar, waitin' for the game to start, and in walks this girl. Oh, it was an amazing game, though. You know, bottom of the eighth, Carbo ties it up at 6-6. It went to twelve. Bottom of the twelfth, in stepped Carlton Fisk. Old Pudge. Steps up to the plate, you know, and he's got that weird stance.
Will: Yeah, yeah.
Sean: And BAM! He clocks it. High fly ball down the left field line! Thirty-five thousand people, on their feet, yellin' at the ball, but that's not because of Fisk. He's wavin' at the ball like a madman.
Will: Yeah, I've seen...
Sean: He's going, "Get over! Get over! Get OVER!" And then it HITS the foul pole. OH, he goes apeshit, and 35,000 fans, you know, they charge the field, you know?
Will: Yeah, and he's fuckin' bowlin' police out of the way!
Sean: Goin', "God! Get out of the way! Get 'em away!" Banging people...
Will: I can't fuckin' believe you had tickets to that fuckin' game!
Sean: Yeah!
Will: Did you rush the field?
Sean: No, I didn't rush the fuckin' field; I wasn't there.
Will: What?
Sean: No - I was in a bar having a drink with my future wife.
Will: You missed Pudge Fisk's home run?
Sean: Oh, yeah.
Will: To have a fuckin' drink with some lady you never met?
Sean: Yeah, but you shoulda seen her; she was a stunner.
Will: I don't care if Helen of Troy walks in the room, that's Game 6!
Sean: Oh, Helen of Troy...
Will: Oh my God; and who are these fuckin' friends of yours, they let you get away with that?
Sean: Oh... they had to.
Will: W-w-w-what'd you say to them?
Sean: I just slid my ticket across the table, and I said, "Sorry, guys; I gotta see about a girl."
Will: I gotta go see about a girl?
Sean: Yeah.
Will: That's what you said? And they let you get away with that?
Sean: Oh, yeah. They saw in my eyes that I meant it.
Will: You're kiddin' me.
Sean: No, I'm not kiddin' you, Will. That's why I'm not talkin' right now about some girl I saw at a bar twenty years ago and how I always regretted not going over and talking to her. I don't regret the 18 years I was married to Nancy. I don't regret the six years I had to give up counseling when she got sick. And I don't regret the last years when she got really sick. And I sure as hell don't regret missing the damn game. That's regret.
Will: Wow... Woulda been nice to catch that game, though.
Sean: I didn't know Pudge was gonna hit a homer.
Clerks II
Randal Graves: Since when did "porch monkey" suddenly become a racial slur?
Dante Hicks: When ignorant racists started saying it a hundred years ago.
Randal Graves: Oh bullshit. My grandmother used to call me a 'porch monkey' all the time when I was a kid, because I'd sit on the porch and stare at my neighbors.
Dante Hicks: Despite the fact that your grandmother might've used it as a term of endearment for you, it's still a racial slur. It'd be like your grandmother calling you a little kike.
Randal Graves: No it is not. Plus my grandmother had nothing but the utmost respect for the Jewish community. When I was a kid, she'd always tell me to treat the Jewish kids well or they'd put the sheeny curse on me.
Dante Hicks: WHAT THE FUCK, MAN?
Randal Graves: What?
Dante: Sheni's a racial slur, too
Randal: Oh, it is not
Dante: Yes, it is!
Randal: She never called any Jews 'sheni', she just used to say sheni curse a lot. It was cute!
Dante: It wasn't cute! It was racist!
Randal: I disagree, man, she was just an old timer, that's the way people talked back then! Didn't mean they were racist... But my grandmother did refer to a broken beer bottle once as a nigger knife... You know, come to think of it, my grandmother was kind of a racist.
Dante: You think?
Randal: : Well, I-I still don't think porch monkey should be considered a racial term. I mean, I've always used it to describe lazy people, not lazy black people! I think if we really tried, we could re-claim porch monkey, and save it.
Dante: It can't be saved, Randal! The sole purpose for its creation, the only reason it exists in the first place, is to disparage an entire race! And even if it could be saved, you can't save it because you're not black!
Randal: Well listen to you! Telling me I can't do something because of the color of my skin! You're the racist! I'm taking it back, you watch!
Hard Ball
Conor O’Neill: I want you guys to take a good look at yourselves and feel proud. We made it here. We're here. What I've learned from you is that really one of the most important things in life is showing up. I'm blown away by your ability to show up through everything that's gone on. The league never wanted you to play this game, but you showed up. But, uh, we only have eight players so, we can't play.
Spaceballs
[Lord Helmet is playing with his dolls in his quarters when Col Sandurz bursts in]
Colonel Sandurz: Lord Helmet!
[Helmet gathers up his dolls in the blink of an eye]
Dark Helmit: What!
Colonel: You're needed on the bridge
Dark Helmet: : Knock on my door! Knock next time!
Colonel: Yes Sir!
Dark Helmet: : Did you see anything?
Colonel: : No, sir! I didn't see you playing with your dolls again.
Dark Helmet: good
Dark Helmet: : Careful you idiot! I said across her nose, not up it!
Gunner: Sorry sir! I'm doing my best!
Dark Helmet: : Who made that man a gunner?
Major Asshole: I did sir. He's my cousin.
Dark Helmet: who's he?
Colonel: He's an asshole sir.
Dark Helmet: I know that! what's his name?
Colonel: That is his name sir. Asshole, Major Asshole!
Dark Helmet: and his cousin?
Colonel: He's an asshole too sir. Gunner's mate First Class Philip Asshole!
Dark Helmet: : How many asholes do we have on this ship, anyway?
[Entire bridge crew stands up and raises a hand]
Entire Bridge Crew: Yo!
Dark Helmet: : I knew it. I'm surrounded by assholes!
[Dark Helmet pulls his face shield down]
Dark Helmet: Keep firing, assholes!
Yogurt: Merchandising, merchandising, where the real money from the movie is made. Spaceballs-the T-shirt, Spaceballs-the Coloring Book, Spaceballs-the Lunch box, Spaceballs-the Breakfast Cereal, Spaceballs-the Flame Thrower.
[turns it on]
[a dink hands him a doll that looks likes Yogurt]
Yogurt:: And last but not least, Spaceballs the doll, me.
[pulls string]
Doll: May the schwartz be with you!
Yogurt: : [kisses the doll] Adorable.
A Muppet Christmas Carol
(I could not choose, so I decided to put a few)
Gonzo: I am here to tell the story
Rizzo: And I am here for the food
[Gonzo and Rizzo are flying over London]
Gonzo: Hello, London
Rizzo: Goodbye, Lunch
Rizzo: There are two things in life I hate-heights and jumping from them.
Gonzo: Come on, I'll catch you.
Rizzo: God save my little broken body.
[Jumps and falls to the ground. He looks at Gonzo]
Gonzo: Missed
Rizzo: Oh wait- I forgot my jellybeans.
[Slides through the bars to retrieve them, and joins Gonzo back on the other side, who is staring at him]
Rizzo: What?
Gonzo: You can fit through those bars?
Rizzo: Yeah
Gonzo: You’re such an idiot
Rizzo: Rats don't understand these things
Gonzo: You were never a lonely child?
Rizzo: I had twelve hundred and seventy four brothers and sisters.
Gonzo: Boy! Rats don't understand these things!
My Girl
Vada: Ode to Ice Cream' by Vada Sultenfuss.
I like ice cream a whole lot
It tastes good on days that are hot
On a cone or in a dish
This will be my only wish
Vanilla, chocolate, rocky road
Even with pie, a la mode.
Vada: Weeping willow with your tears running down,
why do you always weep and frown?
Is it because he left you one day?
is it because he could not stay?
On your branches he would swing,
do you long for the happiness that day would bring?
He found shelter in your shade.
You thought his laughter would never fade.
Weeping willow, stop your tears.
There is something to calm your fears.
You think death has ripped you forever apart.
But I know he'll always be in your heart.
Lion King
Simba: We'll always be together, right?
Mufasa: Simba, let me tell you something my father told me. Look at the stars, the great kings of the past are up there, watching over us.
Simba: Really?
Mufasa: Yes. So whenever you feel alone just remember that those kings will always be there to guide you and so will I.
Mufasa: Look, Simba. Everything the light touches is our kingdom.
Simba: Wow!
Mufasa: A king's time as ruler rises and falls like the sun. One day, Simba, the sun will set on my time here and will rise with you as the new king.
Simba: And this'll all be mine?
Mufasa: Everything.
Simba: Everything the light touches... What about that shadowy place?
Mufasa: That's beyond our borders. You must never go there, Simba.
Simba: But I thought a king can do whatever he wants.
Mufasa: Oh, there's more to being king than...getting your way all the time.
Simba: Awe, There's more?
Mufasa : (Chuckles.) Everything you see exists together in a delicate balance. As king, you need to understand that balance and respect all the creatures from the crawling ant to the leaping antelope.
Simba: But, dad, don't we eat the antelope?
Mufasa: Yes, Simba, but let me explain. When we die, our bodies become the grass. And the antelope eat the grass. And so we are all connected in the great Circle of Life. |
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lol