I'm ok... I hope

03/09/2011

so...yesterday I woke up and was laying in bed when my heart started to pound really hard.
I got scared and didnt know what to do. I waited a but but as I was laying there, I had moments of faint spells sweep through my body on top of the heart pounding.

After about 3 hrs, wondering if I am having a heart attack and if I am going to die, I got up and told my mom I was not feeling well and told her how I felt. She said "oh you probably are coming down with the flu". what?! how does the flu have anything to do with a heart pounding? I told her that I wanted to go to the hospital. She said that I didnt need to and to just drink plenty of fluids and get rest.

I went back to my room and waited. My heart was hurting again so in teers I said, I think I need to go to the hospital.
Mom was going to NH to pick up a car she just bought (her old car had it a year ago but my mom kept driving it) Mom said that when she got home, if I still felt this way, she would take me.
About 2pm, 90 minutes befor my ride was gcoming to pick me up for work, I had another fainting spell on top of the heart pounding and I threw my hands up and said ok, I cant go to work. I emailed my boss and called my ride and called my parents. My mom said that she would call the dr. She called me back and said that I have an apt at 9A.M. I just said ok. I had a light supper, a bowl of pasta and during the day I was snacking on cherios because I was afrade to sit in the chairs in the kitchen because they had wheels and I didnt want to fall if I lost balence. I also kept the portable house phone next to me at all times "just in case". My parents came home and I just tried to relax.

When I was eating dinner, I asked my mom what time the mall was opened. She was going to take me during the afternoon. She said why? I said I wanted to get the cd. (R.E.M. has a new cd out) my mom's response???
"I was going to take you today. It wasnt my fault we didnt go."
I was floored my mom said that to me. Like this heart thing or what ever it is, is my fault.

So I went to the dr. talk to him, had some lab work and was hooked up to an EKG then was sent home hooked up to this portable EKG thing with wires all over my chest. It's strange. So I have to wear this for 48 hrs then bring it back and they will send it out and they'll see if there is any unusual rhythums or what ever else.

But the doctor doesnt believe there is anything actually wrong with my heart but something else that caused it.

so... we'll see