not sure why but all i really wanna do right now is just cry. in a ball. in the dark. alone in my bed. i just feel like i want to break down and let it all go. but i haven't the faintest idea why. i mean, today was alright, stressful as usual but alright. tomorrow is looking to be some fun as i'm spending the day with my hubby and one of my bff's out at the mall. the weather was beautiful today. sun was shining. no arguments today between anyone. it's kinda weird. i've come to two conclusions. one, everything that i have been bottling up inside up to this point is trying to finally break through, or two, i'm really missing some people and dwelling on the past (which is NEVER good in my case) and it's starting to wear me down. all i really know is -lol my guinea pig is doing laps around his cage and making noises and its kinda cute. thanks mocha, you cheered me up a bit. now where was i? oh yeah....- i was watching cartoons to try to put me to sleep and i started crying. at a funny part. smh that's how i knew something was wrong. i never cry when i'm watching a cartoon. ever. *sigh* oh well. i guess all i can do is try to make it a good day, cuz technically its tomorrow already. wow. it's almost three am. :/ i just can't seem to sleep when matthew's gone. and he works five nights a week from 11pm to 7am. so my days are kinda tiring lol. oh well. i guess its off to bed for me now. typing made me sleepy lol. |
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