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~♥ Today I'm Thankful For... Having an amazing partner who wants our relationship to work just as much as I do!
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My boyfriend often says that anything worth having takes hard work. I used to roll my eyes when he said it because I want things to be easy, not hard. But he's right. You have to work hard for things, especially relationships. He and I are very similar in personality so we butt heads often. I am still adjusting to being in a relationship, and one that is healthy, plus adjusting to my new roles as not the boss of everything, as well as the BDSM parts of our relationship. It's a lot to adjust to! Since we are both stubborn, strong-willed, emotional people we have had a few arguments. The last one was Monday evening and it carried over to Tuesday because after I sent an apology text, he didn't receive any of my texts the rest of the day. So he got super upset thinking I was ignoring him and then finally called me, all emotional, and we were able to talk things out. He told me a lot of things and opened up to me in a way he hadn't before. I just assumed that as a Dom he was hard, tough, and didn't feel much. Boy was I wrong to assume that! I am so incredibly blessed to have a man who cares as much as I do and does have feelings. So in the future I have to be more considerate of that.
After our phone call he wanted to see me so we drove to his place and stayed the night. I have to say, we had some damn passionate sex! He screwed me on the balcony of his apartment hahaha, and there were cars going by! *wicked grim* It was fabulous! What can I say, we are kinky people! We had more sex inside as well that was just as fun. It was carnal and passionate and intimate even though it was rough. Before we got to the sex inside, we were outside on the balcony talking for a while and holding each other. We were talking about how much we care about each other and how much we want things to work. He told me, "I care about you A LOT more than you know." And I told him, "Oh I already know." And he told me, "Then say it." And I said no he needed to say it first and he told me to, and back and forth like kids we went. Mind you, I've been feeling this for him for a while now but I wasn't about to rush anything and I wanted to let him lead. I could tell how he felt for a while but I didn't say anything. Well he had his arms wrapped around me and my head was against his chest after we went back and forth, and I told him, "I love you." And he immediately said, "I love you too." ♥♥♥
Now there may be some of you who say it's too soon, and you are welcome to your opinion, but you are incorrect. Each relationship needs to move at it's own flow and each relationship will be different because the people involved are different. Each couple needs to do what's right and what works for their relationship alone. I don't want to hold back or move too quick, so I'm working on keeping a balance. I'm doing my very best to follow my instincts as well as my heart. They have been lining up every time so far which has been a big help. It was the right time for us. It showed how much we truly care about each other. I am not kidding when I say I've felt like I've known him for years. Each week with him feels like a year, it's just how right things are between us. I look at him and I see my future with him - living together, marriage, raising my daughter together, growing old together. Those of you who know me know that 2 months ago I would have laughed in your face and told you that you were dead wrong if you said I'd be planning for that!! I was vehemently against marriage and wanted to live on my own forever. Never say never because you'll have to eat your words later like I am now!
During sex inside he told me he loved me. it was perfect for that moment and brought us so much closer. We both fully understand how much the other cares and how much we both are committed to us. This is a new feeling for us in our relationship so we don't use it all the time. We feel it, but not the full extent of it yet as we things between us are still new and developing. It will be a word and emotion that grows deeper with time and our bond deepening. We didn't say it at all yesterday until I brought it up that evening and wanted to hear it, to which he obliged. We stayed the night again last night and I cooked dinner for him and the munchkin. It was very domestic and very nice. After dinner we watched Bad Boy 2, one of my favorite movies, after the kiddo was in bed. We had a nice night and sex when we went to bed. Morning sex this morning too!
Today, randomly out of nowhere this afternoon, I felt that strong feeling of love. Neither one of us have text it yet so I didn't send it to him like I felt like doing. I'm trying to use it carefully and meaningfully. I'm crazy about him though! He talks about us getting a house together and getting married, and it doesn't freak me out at all. Previously if a guy talked about marriage I would be halfway on my way to Mexico! It would give me panic attacks. Obviously he and I aren't discussing it in serious detail yet, so I have no idea how I'll react then, but even last week I just knew where it was going with him. It was a weighty thing to realize! But I feel happy about it. I want to be with him. He makes me so happy in ways I didn't think possible. He adds so much good to my life and my daughter's life. She's crazy about him too. I finally found my person.
This weekend we are taking a trip as a family to a nearby lake. He's going to teach my kiddo how to fish and she's super excited about it! We're going to grill for lunch and spend the day there. I'm looking forward to it so much because it's such an awesome family type thing to do and I love that we do that kind of stuff. It's just so easy and natural for us. It's just so amazing how we fell into this great connection and easy rhythm of things. It makes me so happy. I will definitely write again after this weekend! The two of them are scheming up ideas for Mother's Day too haha! My kiddo is SO excited because she has a buddy to help her with it now. Whatever they do for me will be perfect because it will come out of love from my two favorite people! ♥♥♥
⊱ ღ Belle Ivy Rose ⊰
Life is pain. Embrace it. Live it. Feel the thrill of falling and the security of rising. Make the most of every moment. Live and love like you'll never let it go. ♥ ~Me
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He seems awesome and like your perfect man...your soul mate. And to hell with anyone who thinks it's too soon or that there is any time that you should say this or do that. It's up to the both of you. Have a good weekend and happy Mother's Day, sweetie! 