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I'm one of those people that believes in equality. For EVERYONE- Man, woman, black, white... Everyone. I do not believe that some people are 'more equal' than others. And unlike other people I know who claim to believe the same things, I actually ACT on it. I really do treat everyone around me the same, and I am friends with dozens of different cultures, including the people that don't speak English very well that no one else will talk to.
But still, in my head, there's a part of me that doesn't care much for other races and people. I talk to them and am friends with them, but I still catch myself flinching when they are near me because I don't want them to touch me. I know that that's horrible, and believe me, I stop as SOON as I notice it- But that doesn't change the fact that as much as I try to "love everyone!", these thoughts and feelings are still a subconscious, natural reaction that I don't know if I will ever be able to change.
I would ask if that makes me 'fake', but I already know that it does. I guess my real question is: What do you do about a situation like this? Do I keep 'pretending' (although that's not really the correct word for it, as I really do think they're nice and friendly people, and I do enjoy their company to an extent) to be politically correct and help myself sleep at night, or do I just cut the sh*t and be like everyone else who claims to believe in equality, but changes their tune as soon as an opportunity to prove it comes up?
I hate fake people, but I think I hate discourtesy even more. | |
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I think that fighting your own underlying prejudices and acting upon your beliefs is the most important thing you can do. Everyone has their own little assumptions, born of experiences and propaganda. The way the battle is won is in each individual person, conquering your OWN prejudices.
Hm. Well, that's a pretty big predicament. I mean it's up to you, really. I think that by fighting it you're better for it, honestly. You obviously know that it's not okay to treat anyone differently for being of a different race or culture, and i praise you for it. If it were me i'd fight it. Maybe even talk to a professional, figure out why it is you feel like that instinctively and take steps to overcome it. Regardless, i'm sure you'll get through it. Even if you decide to be like "nah this is just who i am" and be unabashedly ignorant and bigoted forever, it's still your choice. Good luck to you, whatever you choose.