I don't want to look at how much I weigh.
No.No.No.No.No.No.No.No.NO.
I feel fat.
Gynormous.
I mean I just want to be like EVERYONE else.
Everyone normal.
Actually, I take that back. I dont care if I'm ballerina thin. I don't want to be ballerina thin. But i do want to be healthier. A lot healthier. Like were I can go up the stairs without catching my breath. Im 21 for christ sakes! I shouldn't have to worry about that.
I would say that I'm around 230 maybe a little more. and i have "girls" the size of 40Fs. I'm telling you this because the reason why the girls are so "out" is because I'm so "out". I want to be a size 12 again and I want to be a C cup again. I don't care about being a size six or eight or whatever the "normal weight" is. I know I'll never be supermodel size. it's just not how I'm built. I've got natural curves, "baby makin' hips" as my friend calls them, which I WAY underappreciated when I had them. When i get them back, i'll never underappreciate them again. you never ever realize how awesome you looked until you look back at pictures of the past. When i was in tenth grade, which wasnt that long ago, I had a ROCKin bod. I mean i had a little pudge up front, but jezus it was nothing to be ashamed of. a couple of months in the gym and i could have taken care of that. I used to do 100 crunches a day. I doubt I could do 12 now. haha.
Okay. I know its early for New Years Resolutions, but here they are:
1. Loose 30 pounds by March.
2. Quit the Cookie Store and find a healthier job.
3. Start walking again.
4. Get up to 100 crunches.
5. Take up an activity like pilates or kickboxing
6. Try something active that you've never tried before.
I am ready.
Maybe.
*meh*
Christmas is coming and that's gonna be hard........
I GOT THISSSSS! |
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