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daniellekarwowski's Diary
by daniellekarwowski

I have never been this negative of a person- ever.

08/05/2009

I have never been this negative of a person- ever. I used to be the one who was always the happy-go-lucky kind of person now I always feel like such a downer. I feel like I ruin everything that steps in my path. Every time I build something with someone, I say/do something to ruin it, and then what do you know I'm back to where I started. Some days I feel putting a gun to my head, and mind you I am in no way shape or form what you'd classify as an "emo", just lately I don't know what's wrong with me. So much has changed, including me, and I don't know who I am or any of my "friends" are either. I've built myself an empire of self-hatred, jealousy, remorse, and pain. And I've attempted to demolish this "empire" before but everytime I try it just builds up even higher and higher. Some days I wonder what it would be like if I just dissapeared, and all the people who I've let down would forgive me because that's all there's left to do. I feel so guilty when I bother someone or I find out that I've dissapointed someone and when I try to make it better I just make everything so much worse because I nag and continually apologize until they flip out. I wish I was a different person some days. Someone who knows how to just relax, someone who knows how to forget their own mistakes, someone who has a lot of integrity. I miss who I used to be and I know everyone else does, too. I always feel this giant pressure pushing against my heart preventing me from just being happy. I don't know what's wrong with me.

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*hugs* I can understand that

[LostInMyOwnMindStar|0 likes] [|reply]

Welcome.

[xo heatherStar|0 likes] [|reply]

Well, people do tend to get rather negative when they get themselves an account on Bloop. Welcome, though.

[Lady AnonymousSourceStar|0 likes] [|reply]

Welcome to Bloop.

Don't worry, you're young. You're finding yourself. These feelings are normal. Nothing is wrong with you. I was the same way. Although, whether there is something wrong with ME is still up for debate, hahaha.

[~*Peace of Mind*~Star|0 likes] [|reply]


aw, i know just how you feel, going through that kind of pain at the moment too,

[¤Chancellor St.Blue¤Star|0 likes] [|reply]

You were born about a year after me, and I am exactly the same way right now. Let's be non-emo angsty teens together.

[carias|0 likes] [|reply]


i've seriously considered disappearing. lord knows my family wouldn't miss me.

[Khoquetishღ|0 likes] [|reply]

*hugs* I understand how you feel. I hope you start to feel better soon. And welcome to Bloop

[Hope Rising Star|0 likes] [|reply]

you are a year younger than me and let me tell you i know how you feel. you have days where you think you are going to wake up and be happy and be days where you feel no one wants you around and you arent any fun.

sometimes it can be hormones making your moody and a lot of times it just you changing and getting older. i still have those days a lot, i am here if you want to talk *hugs*

[bratpunkyg02Star|0 likes] [|reply]

Welcome to bloop.

♥

[.Bun.In.The.Oven.Star|0 likes] [|reply]

Image Hosted by ImageShack.usRYC: Thanks for the comment about my doggies I am TOTALLY a dog lover! So are you new to bloop or just started a new diary? Anyway, I'm gonna add ya!

[grumpieisme|0 likes] [|reply]

Image Hosted by ImageShack.usOkay seriously I swear you were describing me as a teenager! Don't worry, things WILL get better. But now you know what you need to work on. Your still finding out who you are, & finding yourself. Just try to be true to who you are. Everything to turn out okay.

[grumpieisme|0 likes] [|reply]

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