so i went on another date today... he was really sweet and kinda cute, and it went really well but i dont think hes exactly what i want...
im bein kinda picky this time around.. having hurt and been hurt seems over and over in this past year has taught me what i want and what i need. and i think i found that in this guy i met at a party a few weeks ago. but idk if he feels the same way... i guess i have to talk to him bout it...i hate that talk...but ah well we shall see.
and my roomates are getting worried which i can understand.they dont want their kid who looks up to me to see me with guy to guy that im dating and get confused and uncomfortable... i know every kid is diffrent and rased diffrent... but my siblings did that and i never really payed much attention... i understood the whole dating and relationship thing was two diffrent things. but i can respect how shes tryin to raise her kid.. i understand it. so i guess we r gonna have to work out something...or me get a boyfriend so im only bringin home one guy hahaha
that and they (more lacy then anyone) doesnt want me to get hurt or not mean to but cause problems. but im really good at avoiding bolth by now so im not to worried bout that.
and scotty and sophie are coming over when they get home... scotty is pretty much moving in. which should get interesting... i used to have a thing with him untill he hit on lacy. i knew he wasnt really interested by then and we were pretty much over being..."involved" but the way he did it was jus disrespectful.. that and hes said to my face that he thinks of me as a joke and a fuck up and nothing but a lazy kid. which is funny cuz hes hella immature...so we are cool and i completely dont have and feelings for him now. jus everyonce in a while get at eachothers throats pretty bad...
and i really dont like sophie... from the first time i saw her 6 years ago she jus screams shallow selfish backstaber... and has proved herself to be exactly that several times. soo im not happy with her bein in the same house even if its jus everynow and then. and i am not goin out of my way to hide that.... never have. so we shall see how all that goes to.
and today i went on myspace and found some more bowling pics in chelseas album with jessica and andrew... jessica and andrew are together and used to be my best friends. but they knew me at the worst times in my life and actually helped me through alot and helped me become alot better person. but they all the sudden told me they didnt want someone like me (or how i was a year ago) in their lives... and jessica bitched me out and hit every nerve possable. so that hurt. and i tryed really really hard to make amends but it jus wasnt happening. the very last time we hung out was them, me, and chelsea bowling... well in the pics it was the exact same group only insted of me was jessie.
so that kinda sucked to see...i miss them so much and i have beat myself up several times for fucking up friendships like that over something so stupid.
so overall im kinda frustraited over a buncha little things... so i wanna get away and jus have a good time.which is awsome cuz lacy offered to take over my all day and night babysitting job at night so i could go out or at least have a break.. i love lacy 
woohoo..so their back and bitching about having the computer back so i guess i g2g.. i gotta sleep anyway.. or at least try, i gotta get up and watch children... gah. peace. |
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