I wondered today if there was any point in getting up. I rolled over every time my alarm went off, starting at eleven, and had that little nice thought tell me that as this was the first day that I didn't have to do something, then I should just remain where I was. I had the cat on me, and she was keeping me warm and...I just didn't want to move.
But I eventually did. I pulled myself up, got changed and went down to the cheaper supermarket down in the village. It's the only way I allow myself to buy anything that doesn't automatically come out of the big shop that the entire household did earlier this week. I have to walk for over forty minutes one way and I have to convince myself that it is worth that I spend the little amount of money I do have. It means now that I can have my pasta properly, as pasta and tuna with no kind of sauce is just wrong. It just doesn't gel and I can't stand it like that.
And considering that I am supposed to be eating healtheir because I am getting back on my 'watching my weight' promise, I need to start with my food again. Unfortunately, my actual Wii and PS2 (I use both of them for the exercise workouts you can get on them) is still at the apartment I was sharing with my boyfriend, and I still don't want to go out and grab the last of my stuff. It was such a hard break-up and I know it's unfair...
I just need to bite the bullet and go over there with a van and clean up the rest of my stuff. It's only clothes and the more heavier boxes that I couldn't grab before but... I need to make a clean break of everything, and I have to find my damn passport as it's the only acceptable form of ID for Social Services. They can't put through my request until I actually show it, though my claim has been made from when they start. But considering that it is a seven week wait at the moment due to backlog (and the fact that they keep on going on strike over wage cuts) I really need to find it somewhere within those boxes.
I've already searched three times through everything and haven't been able to. The only thing I can do now is get everything back into my parents' house (they've taken me in since I lost my home when I broke up with my boyfriend) and search through it again.
I hate this!
I'll probably write more later, as R is having friends over so I will be banished back up to my bedroom again for the night. I don't mind, really. I'll have my computer and notebooks up there with me and hopefully I'll be able to fall asleep, despite the fact that there are people I don't know. Or more importantly, guys I don't.
So, goodbye for now.
Kya |
Loading...